To Chuck Demastus, Evans Given, and all other list members, I would like to apologize to Chuck, Mr. Evans Given, and the entire list for having overreacted and written the two letters I wrote to Mr. Given. It is a bit difficult to not feel emotional when I look out my window at a runway where planes were about to take off to the Mideast and where they continue to. Our base has had squadrons over there 24 hours a day since the Gulf War. We here are extremely sensitive to that and to the increased tensions and activities in the area. We are now under personal threat that includes having to be careful of our home deliveries, etc. (Imagine that at Christmas with all the packages!) What I interpreted as an extremely nasty tone to Mr. Given's letter lit a fuse. Perhaps if you were in my position you might better understand. I only meant to point out that there are many people there and on their way there who appreciate the concern and prayers and that don't appreciate statements that sound non supportive. To have that referred to as "propaganda" was more painful than I can ever put into words. That was a fighting word. When I referred to hoping that the ghosts of Chrismases past, present, and future visit him, I was referring to the changed behavior of Mr. Scrooge after similar visits. You see, it's the holiday season, and mean spirits aren't very welcome. Now, if you read my letter, you'll notice that I said I have been an Air Force wife for more than 25 years. My husband has been in 27 years and if you do your math, you will understand that he was in the Viet Nam conflict as well. So were my father and my brother. They luckily all survived. My husband is still serving and has consistently since then. He and others like him serve for ALL Americans including Mr. Given and I would not have it otherwise and nor would they. I was quite hurt and quite angry and should not have told him to leave the country though, but that's what they said to those who protested during the Viet Nam War. "Love It or Leave It". I imagine people writing their family histories will have to include some who fought in Viet Nam and some who fled to Canada and some who draft dodged in other ways, and some who protested against it. It does become part of history and part of genealogy. I hope that Mr. Given doesn't leave the list as I think everyone is important. However, I hope he tries to use kinder language to express his sentiments in the future. I hope I live the rest of my life never having my pride in my husband and his compatriots referred to as "propaganda". On the issue of the letters about sharing information, I found them extremely helpful although I didn't participate. I almost did. I was learning a lot from them. My point is that different people perceive things different ways. I recently saw a lady unsubscribe from a list because there were too many messages and none of them were concerning her family. Before it took effect, the VERY NEXT MESSAGE contained her family!!! She begged, "Please, please don't take me off this list!" When we hear what we want to hear, we're quite happy. Some lists are quite informal and include discussion on many matters. This usually serves to increase the activity of the list - both the informative, strictly genealogical kind, and the other chat type. It's often worth wading through the chat stuff to find the info. Some people don't feel inclinded to post until and unless they feel comfortable with the list. However, some are strictly genealogy and it's amazing how little activity they have. I wonder how many of us posted to the list for the first or second time in the past couple of days for ANY purpose??? Or were we just lurking and waiting for someone to hand us our line on a silver email??? Anyway, there are two sides to it, and I'd like to suggest two things. Those that cannot deal with anything other than their own line and who don't post, could utilize the archives of the list to search for their personal info. The messages are archived almost daily I believe but by searching for only what you are interested in, it could save some time and be helpful. For those who like to be involved in ALL subjects, some lists have the members insert the word "Chat" into the subject line, so it can be deleted without having to be read and without missing anything. I might have missed something, but I believe that all the messages that were found to be objectional by some over the past couple of days had subject lines that made it quite clear what the subject was and that it was "off subject". How many read the "Prayers" letters and yet expressed objections to them??? Perhaps they could have just looked at the subject line, deleted the message, and moved on to the next message with a lot let stress. Just some point to ponder. Again, I'd like to offer my sincere apologies. I did not feel good seeing the controversy get larger. I prefer peace to ANY conflict. I hope y'all will forgive and understand and I hope we can all put our actions where are words are and offer peace and forgiveness and good will to Mr. Given as well. Sincerely and with Best Wishes for a Wonderful Holiday Season! Donna