Dear Lunney family member, Your intelligent insight and calm concern for others bespeaks a heritage that we hope thrives and grows. Marsha Brown On Mon, Dec 12, 2011 at 5:01 AM, Lunney Family <jglunney@eircom.net> wrote: > I've had a couple of emails about this message which have made me > think that in trying to be amusing, I didn't manage to strike the > notes I meant to. I wanted to say to descendants that if they don't > always get a reply to an initial contact, there might be several > reasons why, and to point out that things might look different from > this side of the Atlantic > > 1. Sometimes the recipient of your letter might mean to reply, but > things just make it difficult, and once you don't reply to a message > for a few weeks then it gets embarrassing to pick it up again > > 2. After years of research, you might well feel that you have > established kinship with the folk in Ireland, that you already know > them, but your letter comes out of the blue to them; they don't know > anything at all about you, and if it is hard for you to imagine their > lives in co. Antrim, so different from yours in Arizona, it is > equally hard for them to imagine you. People in Ulster might well > feel reluctant to write a letter which might have to discuss > potentially upsetting topics like illegitimacy, money, land, to > someone they don't know in the slightest > > 3. When all is said and done, most people in Ulster don't know that > much about distant ancestors; most people in rural areas know a lot > about recent connections, say back to their great grandparents and > may know generally who was related to their family within the last 50 > or 60 years, but before that, there is in general very little exact > knowledge. People in the towns, may often know less than people on > farms. And thus they don't want to have to write back and disappoint > someone, who is keen to know about people who left 200 years ago. > they might not want to have to write a letter saying, "no, sorry, I > don't know anything" when they instinctively know how disappointing > that will be for the recipient > > 4. Mention of DNA links might be a bit offputting for many people in > Ireland; almost no-one understands it or wants to get tangled with > it. If they have heard of DNA at all, it would be in connection with > crime investigations and paternity cases. Much better not to mention > DNA in a first approach. > > 5. I failed especially badly to get my message across in the > section where I was talking about the kind of "Oirish-American" lingo > which is a turn-off for many people in Northern Ireland (for obvious > political and historical reasons; and of course I realize that the > group who read and write Scotch-Irish Rootsweb postings wouldn't make > such an egregious mistake as to use such language in writing to > Ulster relatives!), and so I want to make it clearer to you all that > many people in Ulster very often do feel very strongly the connection > with a place and with a lineage. I personally hope that what I have > been doing in genealogy on the internet will help others make that > connection for themselves. This is something which is a vital part of > my heritage, and I realize how lucky I am that I do know who I am and > where I came from. Knowledge of ancestral places is a wonderful > personal strength for me; everyone who wants to, should be able to > find that knowledge of who and where. I would suggest to everyone > that even if you can't make direct contact with distant kin relatives > in Ireland, that it can be almost as satisfying to make contact with > the place itself; to see the same horizon that your ancestors saw. > And also to make contact with descendants of other families from > there, that your ancestor would have known. People interested in > Ulster Scots ancestry should be aware of how inter-connected all the > families in a given area of several townlands would have been; if not > related, everyone in a five mile radius would have been known. It can > be immensely satisfying to make contact with people whose ancestors > were from the same area. > > 6. And finally to say; don't take it personally! there might be > reasons why they didn't reply. If your initial contact doesn't get a > response, wait a while and try again, maybe with a Christmas card, or > a postcard from your hometown. And make sure it too has your return > address; I really have heard of several enthusiastic "American > letters" which didn't have return addresses on the letter itself > > I hope this clarifies what I was saying in my post of a week ago; I > hope no one has been offended. > > Linde L > > ------------------------------- > To unsubscribe from the list, please send an email to > SCOTCH-IRISH-request@rootsweb.com with the word 'unsubscribe' without the > quotes in the subject and the body of the message >