But that is the whole point of the discussion Ulster is an entity in and off itself. Linde is to be congratulated on telling it as it is. She has done a great service to the lies. It is a pity that some did not seem to see it as the parable that it was, well written and funny. It genuinely tells it as it is. Of course there will be those who don't like it, tough, our country, our rules. A few comments. It would be considered the height of bad manners to turn up at someone's door if you did not know them. This was the position when I left Ulster in 1979, and it would be even more so today. Remember there was a good going War in Ulster from 1968 to say 1990, and people got killed by strangers coming to the door. In Ulster today there is the 90 90 rule, 90% of the population live in communities where 90% of the population are their co-religionists. This leads to great complications in a lot of social intercourse. The religious thing may be fascinating, and a lot of work has been done on it, but it is deadly serious. As far as DNA is concerned, as well as the criminal association, and the proof of parentage in cases of doubt few of the ordinary community will see any utility in it. The question which I as a potential DNA donor who is interested in genealogy would ask is A. Why should I bother? B, Who deals with the potential problems which discoveries about real parenthood might bring? If I who would be kindly disposed to Genealogy would take this line, how would those who are mildly antagonistic to the whole thing jump. We know who we are and that is enough for us. There will be people who will respond courteously and perhaps with information. There will also be those who simply don't see the point. Guess which are the majority? Edward > -----Original Message----- > From: scotch-irish-bounces@rootsweb.com > [mailto:scotch-irish-bounces@rootsweb.com] On Behalf Of Carol > and Joe Marlo > Sent: Monday, December 12, 2011 5:37 PM > To: scotch-irish@rootsweb.com > Cc: FRANK GEBHART > Subject: Re: [S-I] Thoughts on replying to an American/ > Canadian/Australian/ New Zealand/ Argentinian/ South African/ > Englih/Scots/ letter > > Hi,Susan, > > You wouldn't happen to have a SLOWEY in your NI line, would > you?  This is the line that my brother and I have been > searching for for over ten years.  Our approaches have been > polite, but most of them have been ignored; a couple of > replies have been hostile.  We've approached people about > other national lines (in Germany, France, England, and Spain) > and usually we've at least had polite responses.  NI seems to > be an entity in and of itself. > > Carol > > > > ________________________________ > From: SUSAN BR <susanbrown7777@sympatico.ca> > To: scotch-irish@rootsweb.com > Sent: Monday, December 12, 2011 6:28 AM > Subject: Re: [S-I] Thoughts on replying to an American/ > Canadian/ Australian/ New Zealand/ Argentinian/ South > African/ Englih/ Scots/ letter > > > > Linde > I want to respond to this email with my perspective on some > things I've found while visiting NI. > > Let me begin by thanking you for taking the time at such a > busy time of year to explain your original email clearer.  I > too didn't completed understand what you were trying to > convey so again thank you for this clarification. > > We are all guilty of opening emails, putting them aside for > later, and totally forgetting to respond.  These days we are > all too busy it seems but of course we don't do it > intentionally at all. > > As a Canadian who spends a lot of time in the US and having > been in Ireland a couple of times I know what you are saying > about the Scots-Irish.  I've observed that people over there, > and for their own reasons as you suggest, are more reluctant > to open up to complete strangers.  We are in their territory > and they're extremely protective of their territory.  In > Canada and the US we tend to be more open with complete > strangers but to a safe level and comfort zone.  My > experience with people in NI is that they are very very aware > of their neighbours religion which I find very fascinating.  > I can honestly say I don't have a clue what religion my > neighbours are unless they tell me nor am I really interested > in knowing.  And again, it is for obvious reasons over the > years to know who you feel safe with and who you don't feel > safe with I'm sure.  History definitely dictates who we > become and how we feel about things. > > The researchers I've had the pleasure of meeting are ALL > extremely helpful and more than willing to drive you around > all over to help you find your ancestors properties But they > aren't prepared to go to their door for you.  We Canadians > and Americans would do it after traveling so far with no > hesitation.  When you do knock on a strangers door they > aren't always willing and receptive so people need to be > prepared for that and tread lightly.  I've run into this a few times. > > As for DNA, you've answered a question I've had.  Over the > years I've been perplexed at the unwillingness of a male in > Co. Antrim who could really answer a lot of questions if we > could just get his DNA but he absolutely is unwilling to > participate. I've corresponded with the family a number of > times, even had them over for tea while staying there but > nope, he is not interested.  Maybe with more advertising over > there locally it might give more insight to the advantages of > doing DNA.  Here in US and Canada I know a lot of people who > are thrilled with DNA results and comparing these results on > familytreedna.  Having said that, people over there are > quite settled in their world and just are not interested or > maybe there's a safety factor involved for them too. > > You mention your personal connection to genealogy.  I too > feel exactly the same way.  I've had the pleasure and luck of > getting back to 1560 with my McCaw lineage and back even > further to Isle of Bute with the expertise of many > researchers from Co. Antrim.  It is my goal to give that same > gift to as many as I can now and it's in my blood too, I love it. >   > Over the years doing Loyalist research in Canada, mostly from > Co. Antrim I've identified peoples ancestors just by surname > association from headstones I've seen over there.  The > inter-connection you refer to over there, I see here too.  > People travelled and settled with their neighbours which can > be found on ships lists, land registrations and cemetery > lists over here. >   > I encourage people to try to get over to Northern Ireland if > they can.  There's no feeling in this world like the feeling > of stepping on the same ground your gr gr gr grandparents > living on.  It is a very unusual feeling and I can't wait to > do it again. > > People might be interested in looking into this event too.  > It is well worth the money. > >   > http://nalil.blogspot.com/2009/04/route-back-home-ballymoney-2 010.html  Take time to look at the files on this blog too.  > They do a great job. > > Linda Merle keep up the great work here,  Susan    > > > > > > > From: jglunney@eircom.net > > Date: Mon, 12 Dec 2011 10:01:58 +0000 > > To: scotch-irish@rootsweb.com > > Subject: Re: [S-I] Thoughts on replying to an American/ > Canadian/ Australian/ New Zealand/ Argentinian/ South > African/ Englih/ Scots/ letter > > > > I've had a couple of emails about this message which have made me > > think that in trying to be amusing, I didn't manage to strike the > > notes I meant to. I wanted to say to descendants that if they don't > > always get a reply to an initial contact, there might be several > > reasons why, and to point out that things might look different from > > this side of the Atlantic > > > > 1. Sometimes the recipient of your letter might mean to reply, but > > things just make it difficult, and once you don't reply to > a message > > for a few weeks then it gets embarrassing to pick it up again > > > > 2. After years of research, you might well feel that you have > > established kinship with the folk in Ireland, that you already know > > them, but your letter comes out of the blue to them; they > don't know > > anything at all about you, and if it is hard for you to > imagine their > > lives in co. Antrim, so different from yours in Arizona, it is > > equally hard for them to imagine you. People in Ulster might well > > feel reluctant to write a letter which might have to discuss > > potentially upsetting topics like illegitimacy, money, land, to > > someone they don't know in the slightest > > > > 3. When all is said and done, most people in Ulster don't know that > > much about distant ancestors; most people in rural areas know a lot > > about recent connections, say back to their great grandparents and > > may know generally who was related to their family within > the last 50 > > or 60 years, but before that, there is in general very little exact > > knowledge. People in the towns, may often know less than people on > > farms. And thus they don't want to have to write back and > disappoint > > someone, who is keen to know about people who left 200 years ago. > > they might not want to have to write a letter saying, "no, sorry, I > > don't know anything" when they instinctively know how disappointing > > that will be for the recipient > > > > 4. Mention of DNA links might be a bit offputting for many > people in > > Ireland; almost no-one understands it or wants to get tangled with > > it. If they have heard of DNA at all, it would be in > connection with > > crime investigations and paternity cases. Much better not > to mention > > DNA in a first approach. > > > > 5. I failed especially badly to get my message across in the > > section where I was talking about the kind of > "Oirish-American" lingo > > which is a turn-off for many people in Northern Ireland > (for obvious > > political and historical reasons; and of course I realize that the > > group who read and write Scotch-Irish Rootsweb postings > wouldn't make > > such an egregious mistake as to use such language in writing to > > Ulster relatives!), and so I want to make it clearer to you > all that > > many people in Ulster very often do feel very strongly the > connection > > with a place and with a lineage. I personally hope that what I have > > been doing in genealogy on the internet will help others make that > > connection for themselves. This is something which is a > vital part of > > my heritage, and I realize how lucky I am that I do know > who I am and > > where I came from. Knowledge of ancestral places is a wonderful > > personal strength for me; everyone who wants to, should be able to > > find that knowledge of who and where. I would suggest to everyone > > that even if you can't make direct contact with distant kin > relatives > > in Ireland, that it can be almost as satisfying to make > contact with > > the place itself; to see the same horizon that your ancestors saw. > > And also to make contact with descendants of other families from > > there, that your ancestor would have known. People interested in > > Ulster Scots ancestry should be aware of how > inter-connected all the > > families in a given area of several townlands would have > been; if not > > related, everyone in a five mile radius would have been > known. It can > > be immensely satisfying to make contact with people whose ancestors > > were from the same area. > > > > 6. And finally to say; don't take it personally! there might be > > reasons why they didn't reply. If your initial contact > doesn't get a > > response, wait a while and try again, maybe with a > Christmas card, or > > a postcard from your hometown. And make sure it too has your return > > address; I really have heard of several enthusiastic "American > > letters" which didn't have return addresses on the letter itself > > > > I hope this clarifies what I was saying in my post of a week ago; I > > hope no one has been offended. > > > > Linde L > > > > ------------------------------- > > To unsubscribe from the list, please send an email to > SCOTCH-IRISH-request@rootsweb.com with the word 'unsubscribe' > without the quotes in the subject and the body of the message >                         > > ------------------------------- > To unsubscribe from the list, please send an email to > SCOTCH-IRISH-request@rootsweb.com with the word 'unsubscribe' > without the quotes in the subject and the body of the message > > ------------------------------- > To unsubscribe from the list, please send an email to > SCOTCH-IRISH-request@rootsweb.com with the word 'unsubscribe' > without the quotes in the subject and the body of the message