I think most of us are just trying to find ways of recording the truth of relationships to the best of our ability. I agree that when you are researching more than a generation or two ago, you must not make any assumptions about someone having "never married", but if you have a great uncle who told you he never married, I think it is fine to enter "Never Married" in the spouse box or marriage box. However, "Never" is very difinitive, and can't be used carelessly. I only use the term "Not Married" for two people who live (or lived) together, usually when they had children together, but also couples in long-term relationships with no children, although it would be nice to have a "Common-Law" designation in that case. Because marriage is not as popular/traditional as it was just a generation ago, I have the more difficulty in trying to keep the current family relationships documented correctly than the historical ones. For example, I have a nephew who has lived with three different women with whom he had children (no moral judgements, please, I just want to record the truth). The first two relationships ended just before the birth of the children, so I entered the mother of the child in the spouse box and the term "Not Married" in the marriage box. He is now in a more committed relationship with two children which may eventually turn into a marriage, in which case I will easily replace "Not Married" with a marriage date. I see no reason to keep track of any short-term relationships that did not produce children. All I care about is being able to document my families as correctly as possible, but there isn't enough "standardized" terminology or procedure to cover it all, YET . . . Sherrie

Sherrie Apperson wrote: > All I care about is being able to document my families as correctly as > possible, but there isn't enough "standardized" terminology or procedure > to cover it all, YET . . . And when there IS standardization of terminology, you'll find some man who fits the definition of POSSLQ objecting to the term, wanting to replace it instead with PLQ or Roommates or Partners or "Good Friends" quotes and all. You can't win with this one (g) there'll always be an odd-ball who can't be forced into any hole, let alone the hectagonal one meant for him. Cheryl