> >  Southern Terminology > >   Only a Southerner knows the difference between a hissie fit and a conniption fit, and that you don't "HAVE" them, you "PITCH" them. > >   _____ > > > >   Only a Southerner knows how many fish, collard greens, turnip greens, peas, beans, etc., make up "a mess." > >   _____ > > > >   Only a Southerner can show or point out to you the general direction of "yonder." > >   _____ > > > >   Only a Southerner knows exactly how long "directly" is, as in: "Going to town, be back directly." > >   _____ > > > >   Even Southern babies know that "Gimme some sugar" is not a request for the white, granular sweet substance that sits in a pretty little bowl in the middle of the table. > >   _____ > > > >   All Southerners know exactly when "by and by" is.  They might not use the term, but they know the concept well. > >   _____ > > > >   Only a Southerner knows instinctively that the best gesture of solace for a neighbor who's got trouble is a plate of hot fried chicken and a big bowl of cold potato salad.  If the neighbor's trouble is a real crisis, they also know to add a large banana puddin! > >   _____ > > > >   Only Southerners grow up knowing the difference between "right near" and "a right far piece."  They also know t hat "just down the road" can be 1 mile or 20. > >   _____ > > > >   Only a Southerner, both knows and understands, the difference between a redneck, a good ol'boy, and po' white trash. > >   _____ > > > >   No true Southerner would ever assume that the car with the flashing turn signal is actually going to make a turn. > >   _____ > > > >   A Southerner knows that "fixin" can be used as a noun, a verb, or an adverb. > >   _____ > > > >   Only Southerners make friends while standing in lines,... and when  we're "in line," . We talk to everybody! > >   _____ > > > >   Put 100 Southerners in a room and half of them will discover they're related, even if only by marriage. > >   _____ > > > >   In the South, y all is singular, .... all yall is plural. > >   _____ > > > >   Southerners know grits come from corn and how to eat them. > >   _____ > > > >   Every Southerner knows tomatoes with eggs, bacon, grits, and coffee are perfectly wonderful; that red eye gravy is also a breakfast food; and that fried green tomatoes are not a breakfast food. > >   _____ > > > >   When you hear someone say, "Well, I caught myself lookin'," you know you are in the presence of a genuine Southerner! > >   _____ > > > >   Only true Southerners say "sweet tea" and "sweet milk."  Sweet tea indicates the need for sugar and lots of it -- we do not like our tea unsweetened.  "Sweet milk" means you don't want buttermilk. > >   _____ > > > >   And a true Southerner knows you don't scream obscenities at little old ladies who drive 30 MPH on the freeway. You just say,"Bless her heart" ... and go your own way. > >   _____ > > > >   And to those of you who are still having a hard time understanding all this Southern stuff,.... bless  your hearts, I hear they are fixin' to have classes on Southernness as a second language! > >   _____ > > > >   And for those that are not from the South but have lived here for a long time,  all yall need a sign to hang on yalls front porch that reads "I ain't from the South, but I got here as fast as I could." > >   ____ > > > >   Bless your hearts, . yall have a blessed day. > > > > > > NOW I know! BUT this is From one of My Johnson Cousins that lives in California, but LAUZY ME, ya read this & YA, know she aint been outa Tenn, Too auful long. CUZ A T