from a letter i wrote to vee tonight: "you have also provided something that is sadly lacking in our modern age with its transiency and separation of the generations: the reminiscences of a wise elder looking back upon her life in a particular place, so that those who are younger or who have gone away from the 'homeplace' of their youth, or in my case, never lived there but are hungry for stories of what their lost father's youth might have been like, can carry along in themselves the fruit of your experience and perspective. in another time, vee, we would all have gathered around the hearth each night to hear you tell your lifestory and the history of your 'homeplace' and family. the internet can be a cold and alienating thing, but it can also allow this kind of sharing by people who cannot physically be present in your living room to hear these tales spoken by you. (and you don't have to clean up after all of us after we leave)" and the truth is, that after all that vee has contributed to this list and the help she's given people privately, and given the emotional trauma she's just been through with her mastectomy, even if she HAD been 'rambling' about something not of interest to me at the moment (which she was not), i would not have been so ungracious as to criticize her for it. i've had two bouts with breast cancer including three surgeries myself, and it's a horrible emotional shock; i'm sure vee IS feeling extremely emotionally sensitive right now, and i feel bad that SHE was made to feel bad over this. i have admired the way she has bounced back so quickly from her surgery and continued to share her reminiscences with us. i hope she will bounce back from the emotional hurt and rejoin us, i think she needs us as much as we need her. the worst thing for someone with cancer is isolation from friends and shared interests. -- "An aimless joy is a pure joy," ...And wisdom is a butterfly And not a gloomy bird of prey." ~ William Butler Yeats, "Tom O'Roughley" ---------- >From: CAhobbies@aol.com >To: NYNIAGAR-L@rootsweb.com >Subject: Re: Topics on this list >Date: Sun, Aug 27, 2000, 11:47 PM > >>From Ellen: > << ..... I'm heartsick that we've lost a treasured contributor to this > list. I've reiterated to Vee that her health is the most important thing > for her to concentrate on right now, but that I'd gladly welcome her > rejoining us whenever she feels better. I know I speak for many others > when I say that the list will miss her terribly. :( >> > > -->> Ellen and All, > You said many things in your message after reading Vee's unsubscribe > message. I realize Vee herself will not see this, but I think there are > two primary things here: > 1) I agree. The most important thing for Vee right now is doing whatever > gives her the most peace of mind, pleasure and healing as possible. On or > off list.. But, yes... she will surely and sorely missed here if she stays offlist. > 2) I'm happy that "remembrances" are deemed "on topic" on this list. For > those who do not wish to go that direction, it's easy to "delete" and move > on to the next post. We have lots of different types of posts here - and > that's a good thing! > > That's the "list stuff". On a personal note, I'm just sorry that a valued > list member was made to "feel bad" for sharing her memories. I understand > that it was done privately - and that's good - but still - why the need at > all? Multiple conversations are possible here... so why not just start up > one of interest and "carry on"??? And why not just be "glad" we have folks > who "do" want to share their memories? > > Sounds like there were a lot of wellwishes sent to Vee privately... and > just this "one"... that didn't ... but it comes at a vulnerable time... so > while not the majority, all it would "take" is one, when you are not > feeling up to snuff. > > Ah well.. Ellen.. thanks for publically commenting... hope Vee reads (and > takes to heart) your private message. I'm sure she'll get others as well. > > To all of "you"... I enjoy this list. And part of "that" is because there > "is" variety. We can discuss surnames, availability of records, the latest > cemetary walk.. or "what life was like when"... We can take that local > history walk via a pioneer book... or look a little closer to home.. and > talk to people "now".... in our own families if it isn't too late... and > with folks here on this list!!! It's "all" part of the fabric of what we do! > > debbie > CAhobbies@aol.com > > > > > > ==== NYNIAGAR Mailing List ==== > To obtain New York State vital records (birth, death, marriage), see > <http://www.health.state.ny.us/nysdoh/consumer/vr/geninst.htm>. > >