Hi, I don't know the laws in New York, but in Nevada there must be written notification to the cemetery from a known relative before a body can be exhumed for any reason, and vise versa. When my mother died 3 years ago and my brother and I were at the cemetery arranging the burial plans, my brother suggested we go see the graves of our grandparents. Well, we searched and searched, and my brother was certain we were in the right location, (he is a land surveyor). Too make a long story short, we went back into the cemetery's office and explained to them that we couldn't find or grandparents. Needless to say, there were a lot of "oh, oh looks" and they assured us that if we could come back they would physically take us to the location of their burial. My brother and I went back and looked in the area that my brother was certain that the bodies were and it was only then that we noticed that the wall that once was squared off was now rounded, with freshly dug dirt, no longer any grass, sprinklers out of the ground, and so forth. It was very clear that they had just changed the design of the wall and our grandparents had been buried in the corner where the two walls met. I spoke to the funeral director about this on the day of my mother's burial three days later and he was quietly chuckling on the phone...and said something like "we found them, and when you are here we will show you where they are." After my mother's funeral we went to the office and they gave us a recently made plot map and my brother and myself went to the area on the map that listed their burial. We found them, but the headstones were brand new, (they have been buried for over 15 years), there were no nicks from lawn mowers, no tarnish from weather, nothing, and since they were cremated it would have been easy for the cemetery to have moved the headstones and the urn that was positioned between them. Believe me, the cemetery was sweating what action our family was going to take. My dad didn't seem to care, and since it was his dad, we dropped it, but it just goes to show that anything can happen. It also makes one wonder what they would have done with the headstones and cremated remains if it wasn't for such a twist of fate. Just thought I would share, and good luck on your quest. Debera.