----- Original Message ----- From: "Richard Hardwick" Sent: Thursday, June 21, 2007 11:39 AM Subject: [NS-L] Related to myself - how? SUMMARY > Hello all again > > I have received many a favorable response from several listers (on-list) > and one not so happy response (off-list) from a fellow that evidently > doesn't like to participate in discussions such as this. I consider this > type of question one that is a definite learning experience. I'm hoping > most others agree. ********snipped****** Was in the middle of answering your post, when the storm came back, causing a power outage. I agree with what you said Richard. Each of us has a delete button and no one is forcing another to 'participate' when they don't wish to. This list reminds me of the Lanark one. Wide variety of topics discussed, some not always just about NS in particular, but majority are definately learning experiences. Don't know who the 'List Granny' is on the Lanark list, as we never see any posts from them, but we seem to have free rein (to a large extent), making the list lively, with fascinating and informative posts. This NS list is somewhat similar. Many people, particularly those just starting to take up this addicting hobby, have trouble understanding or have never given 'relationships' any thought. Makes me think of my husband. When we were dating/first married, he always referred to his brother-in-law and niece as "my sister's husband", "my sister's child". It kind of 'bothered me' .. so I asked him why he did. He didn't know what they were to him! Now my bloke is not dumb (normally! <vbg>) but he'd never given it any thought. I lose him totally when I go beyond first cousin, even just to 1C1R (first cousin, once removed). He cannot believe I can keep all our living cousins' relationships (to us) straight. I've much contact with 2nd cousins, with whom I grew up. Their mother is still alive .. my 1C1R (who I call Aunt Sis, which confuses folk). She is 1C3R to my grandchildren. Her great-grandchildren are 4th cousins to my grandchildren. When someone takes up family research and manages to go back 2-3 generations, doing the lateral lines as well, it can become very confusing rather quickly. They may not realize at first that they are looking at cousin marriages. When you add to the mix, (keeping it simple .. <vbg>) uncles/aunts marrying the widow/widower of a deceased uncle/aunt and all of them had children previously, then more children are born from the re-marriage(s) ... then they marry cousins/step-cousins .. before long you are going in circles, pulling your hair out by the roots, trying to make sense of it all. With one of my families in Devon England, we have 2 sisters and a brother who married 2 brothers and a sister .. they were 3rd cousins to each other. There is more with those 3(6) lines, both before and after ... believe me it is very complicated. Have similar 'problems' with my Mum's paternal NE Scotland line. I don't consider myself an expert, but I have learned a few things in the past nearly 8y I've been at it (primarily UK research - extremely little in Canada), so try to help either with the resources I have or from personal experience. I think the discussion we've been having on this topic of being related to oneself and half-cousins etc, adds to the knowledge of those who are more recent to the hobby. If nothing else, it lets them know they are not going bonkers .. such relationships do exist. Toni ~ Ontario [WYATT / STONE - Millview/Bedford/ Lower Sackville Halifax Co / Oxford / Cumberland]