Hi All These are the clean ones ............ Probably why they're not <that> funny ! Regards Dave > Wanting to be married, a couple came to the county courthouse in > Virginia where I work. They accidentally walked up to the offices > where hunting licenses are sold. > > "We're from out-of-state," said the prospective groom. "Can we get a > license?" > > The clerk replied, "No, but I can give you a three-day permit." > ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ > For a holiday, an Irishman decided to go to Switzerland > to fulfil a lifelong dream and climb the Matterhorn. > > He hired a guide, and just as they neared the top, the > men were caught in a snow slide. Three hours later, a Saint Bernard plowed > through to them, a keg of brandy tied under his chin. > > "Hooray!" shouted the guide. "Here comes man's best friend!" > > "Yeah," said the Irishman. "An' look at the size of > the dog that's bringin' it!" > ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ > > One summer, a drought threatened the crop in a small town. On a hot and dry > Sunday, the village parson told his congregation, "There isn't anything that > will save us except to pray for rain. Go home, pray, believe, and come back > next > Sunday ready to thank God for sending rain." > > The people did as they were told and returned to church > the following Sunday. But as soon as the parson saw > them, he was furious. > > "We can't worship today. You do not yet believe," he said. > > "But," they protested, "we prayed, and we do believe." > > "Believe?" he responded. "Then where are your > umbrellas?" --- Outgoing mail is certified Virus Free. Checked by AVG anti-virus system (http://www.grisoft.com). Version: 6.0.230 / Virus Database: 111 - Release Date: 25-Jan-01