I‘M DESCENDED FROM ADAM! (This poem is a gentle dig at self-important people who indulge in bouts of wishful thinking and award themselves fantastic and ludicrous family trees.) Said the vainglorious fool, with a wave of his hand, ”I‘m descended from Adam, you know." ”Aren‘t we all?" laughed his friend, who was rather less grand, ”But, pray, can you prove it — how so?" ”I can!" quoth the fool, with a gesture so curt, Aggrieved at the other‘s mild scorn. He proclaimed in a voice full of pique and vexed hurt, ”I‘ll make you regret you were born!" >From a shiny black briefcase, all gleaming and smart, Sporting a very superior label, He flourished aloft a voluminous chart And unfurled it with pride on the table. ”Here is your proof," he cried in great glee, Extending his chest fit to bust. ”I‘ll show you the lineage from Adam to me, ”And beg pardon for doubting you must." The other man peered at the fabulous chart, Awash with fine names and bold squiggles. 'Twas all he could do, with the best will at heart, To suppress an attack of the giggles. In fanciful lines from the pre-dawn of mankind, Sprinkled with mythical gods in collusion, The naive fellow had contrived to find A pedigree of utter delusion. >From Noah and his Ark and the kings of old Troy, Through the descendants of Alfred the Great, The ancestry ran in lines of pure joy To a sixth cousin of Henry the Eight. >From Vikings and Normans and Crusaders bold, The family tree was a sham. >From Cromwell and Nelson and generals of old, And even the King of Siam! Through Tudors and Stuarts, Hanoverians, too, Meandering down avenues peculiar, The lineage finally came to a cottage in Looe And an eccentric old lady called Julia. ”My grandmother, you know," said the boastful one, ”Her ancestry is really breathtaking." ”Quite so," said his doubting comrade in fun, ”But are you sure that she wasn‘t faking?" ”How dare you suggest that?" the foolish knave said, ”She‘s really too much of a madam ”To invent such a fiction inside of her head, ”I‘m truly descended from Adam." With a shake of his head, the doubting friend left, His feelings of mirth to relieve. No point in debating with one so bereft, People believe what they want to believe! (Copyright R Stockdill 1998) FROM: "Rhyming Relations: Genealogy in Verse", an 80-page paperback book of genealogical poetry, serious and comic, available from the author. Roy Stockdill Editor, The Journal of One-Name Studies The Stockdill Family History Society (Guild of One-Name Studies, FedFHS) STOCKDILL PREST YELLOW BOLTON WORSNOP GIBSON MIDGLEY BRACEWELL SHACKLETON BRADLEY MOODY in Yorkshire North & West Ridings MEAD YOUNG in Somerset, Wiltshire & Gloucestershire Web page of the Stockdill Family History Society:- http://ourworld.compuserve.com/homepages/roystock ”Never ask a man if he comes from Yorkshire. If he does he will tell you. If he does not, why humiliate him?" - Canon Sydney Smith (scholar and humorist 1771-1845)