Martha, I have neuropathy in my feet and in constant pain so I know what she is going through. There are a lot of people who complain about their legs hurting. Compression stockings might help. I think that maybe you need a prescription to get the ones that would help her. Wish I had more help. Barb On Thu, Feb 6, 2014 at 11:00 PM, grace gathman <grace.gathman@gmail.com>wrote: > If it has only been a week since her husband of many years passed away she > really hasn't worked through the first stage of grief--she really does need > a little more time and space--even if that space is within herself. Do you > have a pastor who she is close to--just holding some ones hand and talking > out her feelings would help. She has a lot to process and it does take > time. If you have a hospice organization in your area, even if they weren't > involved with your father they have wonderful grief volunteers. Does she > like music? Listening to hymns and songs that are meaningful to her might > help her work through these first weeks of her loss. You are right that > there isn't much medicine that works for neuropathy, but keeping her legs > elevated might help some. Both of you need time and love of others these > first hard weeks. Does she knit or do any handicraft that might give her a > goal to work toward? You both will be in my prayers. Grace > > > On Thu, Feb 6, 2014 at 8:22 PM, Neysa <gramneysa@ct.metrocast.net> wrote: > > > Been there, Martha. And I didn't realize what was going on. Mom took > > care of Dad until he went into a nursing home; then she visited everyday. > > When he died, suddenly she had nothing to do. Had given up all her > > activities to take care of him and his problems. Her sister came to live > > with her, which I thought was a good thing, but the sister didn't want to > > go anywhere or do anything. Sister didn't drive, so that was left to > Mom. > > > > Actually she was still "alone" with no one to do anything with. For a > > while she did take them out riding but soon she was tired again...and > even > > after we brought them over here and after Mom came to live with us, she > had > > lost any desire to do anything but watch TV. In her case she was going > > into dementia, which no one could do anything about. > > > > I do wish (hind-sight) that I had found someone who could have told me > > what was happening mentally. Perhaps her doctor has seen her for so > long > > he knows what is wrong without checking? If you can't get him to take > > another good look, I suggest looking for someone knowledgeable in > > age-related problems and see if they will see your mother. They may be > > able to help you get her going again. Sooner the better cause it is hard > > to get moving again if you sit still too long. > > Neysa > > ----- Original Message ----- > > From: grandbanna > > To: memory-lane@rootsweb.com > > Sent: Thursday, February 06, 2014 6:43 PM > > Subject: [ML] I Need A Voice of Experience Please > > > > > > > > As you know I posted about my Dad passing away Feb. 1. My Mother is > now > > with me. She can't stay by herself. Daddy kept her up night and day so > > she hasn't had much rest in a couple of years now. As long as they were > in > > their home, she was up and going but now she has set down and doesn't get > > up unless she needs to go to the restroom or to eat. She would sleep all > > day if I would let her. I'm still having a hard time emotionally, so I > > know she must be dealing with even more than I am. I know she needs to > > rest for a while. The thing is, I just don't know when to start > > encouraging her to be active again. She has neuropathy in her legs and > > says she would get up if her legs didn't hurt so bad. Medication doesn't > > help. I could ask her doctor but he would just give her another pill. > She > > needs something to keep her occupied. I have that, but she is totally > > removed from her familiar surroundings. Does anyone have suggestions as > to > > how I can help her. I'm sorry since! > > t! > > his is not an advice website but I felt like some of you would have > > wise advice. > > > > Martha > > > > > > > > > > > > http://freepages.genealogy.rootsweb.com/~mbousman1/memory.htm > > > > > > > > ------------------------------- > > To unsubscribe from the list, please send an email to > > MEMORY-LANE-request@rootsweb.com with the word 'unsubscribe' without the > > quotes in the subject and the body of the message > > > > > > > > > > > > http://freepages.genealogy.rootsweb.com/~mbousman1/memory.htm > > > > > > > > ------------------------------- > > To unsubscribe from the list, please send an email to > > MEMORY-LANE-request@rootsweb.com with the word 'unsubscribe' without the > > quotes in the subject and the body of the message > > > > > > > > http://freepages.genealogy.rootsweb.com/~mbousman1/memory.htm > > > > ------------------------------- > To unsubscribe from the list, please send an email to > MEMORY-LANE-request@rootsweb.com with the word 'unsubscribe' without the > quotes in the subject and the body of the message >