1. In the front yard of a funeral home: "Drive carefully, we'll wait." 2. On an electrician's truck: "Let us look into your shorts." 3. Outside a radiator repair shop: "Best place in town to take a leak." 4. In a non-smoking area: "If we see you smoking, we will assume you are on fire and take appropriate action." 5. On a maternity room door: "PUSH, PUSH, PUUUUUSSSSSHHHH!" 6. On a front door: "Everyone on the premises is a vegetarian EXCEPT THE DOG." 7. At an optometrist's office; "If you don't see what you're looking for, you've come to the right place." 8. On a taxidermist's window "We really know our stuff." 9. On a butcher's window "Let me meat your needs." 10. On a fence "Salesmen welcome. Dog food is expensive." 11. At a car dealership; "The best way to get back on your feet - miss a car payment." 12. Outside a muffler shop: "No appointment necessary. We'll hear you coming." 13. In a dry cleaner's emporium: "Drop your pants here." 14. On a desk in a reception area: "We shoot every 3rd salesman, and the 2nd one just left." 15. In a veterinarian's waiting room: "Be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!"