Bill U. sent me this and it's right on. Girls, did I ever use any of these with you? >Most of our generation were HOME SCHOOLED...at least in some ways. > >1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE . >"If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished >cleaning." >2. My mother taught me RELIGION. >"You better pray that will come out of the carpet." >3. My father taught me about TIME TRAVEL. >"If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of >next week!" >4. My father taught me LOGIC. >" Because I said so, that's why." >5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC . >"If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to >the store with me." >6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT. >"Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident." >7. My father taught me IRONY. >"Keep crying, and I'll give you something to cry about." >8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS . >"Shut your mouth and eat your supper." >9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM. >"Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!" >10. My mother taught me about STAMINA . >"You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone." >11. My mother taught me about WEATHER. >"This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it." >12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY. >"If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!" >13. My father taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE. >"I brought you into this world, and I can take you out.." >14.. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION . >"Stop acting like your father!" >15. My mother taught me about ENVY. >"There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't >have wonderful parents like you do." >16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION. >"Just wait until we get home." >17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING . >"You are going to get it when you get home!" >18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE. >"If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to get stuck that >way." >19. My mother taught me ESP. >"Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?" >20. My father taught me HUMOR. >"When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come running to me." >21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT . >"If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up." >22. My mother taught me GENETICS. >"You're just like your father." >23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS. >"Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?" >24. My mother taught me WISDOM. >"When you get to be my age, you'll understand. >25. My mother taught me about JUSTICE . >"One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you! --- This email is free from viruses and malware because avast! Antivirus protection is active. http://www.avast.com