This has nothing to do with Folklore or Legends, or anything else we discuss. I just found it amusing. Kim To Technical Support: > > > Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0 and noticed that the > new program began unexpected child processing that took up a lot of space > and valuable resources. No mention of this phenomenon was included in the > product brochure In addition, wife 1.0 installs itself into all other > programs and launches during system initialization, where it monitors all > other system activity. > > Applications such as Poker night 10.3, Drunken Boys Night 2.5 and Saturday > Football 5.0 no longer run, crashing the system whenever selected. I can not > seem to keep Wife 1.0 in the background while attempting to run some of my > other favorite applications. I am thinking about going back to Girlfriend > 7.0, but un-install does not work on this program. > > Can you help me, please? > > > Thanks Joe > > Dear Joe : > > This is a very common problem men complain about but is mostly due to a > primary misconception. Many people upgrade from girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0 > with the idea that Wife 1.0 is merely a "UTILITIES & ENTERTAINMENT" > program. > > Wife 1.0 is an OPERATING SYSTEM and designed by its creator to run > everything. It is unlikely you would be able to purge Wife 1.0 and still > convert back to Girlfriend 7.0. Hidden operating files within your system > would cause Girlfriend 7.0 to emulate Wife 1.0 so nothing is gained. It is > impossible to un-install, delete, or purge the program files from the > system once installed. > > You can not go back to Girlfriend 7.0 because Wife 1.0 is not designed to do > this. Some have tried to install Girlfriend 8.0 or Wife 2.0 but end up with > more problems than the original system. Look in your manual under > "Warnings-Alimony /Child Support." > > I recommend you keep Wife 1.0 and just deal with the situation. Having Wife > 1.0 installed myself, I might also suggest you read the entire section > regarding General Partnership Faults (GPFs). You must assume all > responsibility for faults and problems that might occur, regardless of their > cause. The best course of action will be to enter the command > C:\APOLOGIZE. > In any case avoid excessive use of the "Esc" key because ultimately you will >have to give the > APOLOGIZE command before the operating system will return to normal. The > system will run smooth as long as you take the blame for all the PS. Wife > 1.0 is a great program, but very high maintenance. > > Consider buying addition software to improve the performance of Wife 1.0. I > recommend Flowers 2.1 and Chocolates 5.0. Do not, under any circumstances, > install Secretary With Short Skirt 3.3. This is not a supported application > for Wife 1.0 and is likely to cause irreversible damage to the operating > system. > > Best of luck > Tech Support