In a message dated 13/11/99 6:53:06 AM Central Standard Time, wlockhart@brooksdata.net writes: << Dave, I absolutely agree with you. That is why I put "English Army" in quotes; I meant for this to be ironic. If I were speaking to you might sarcastically say "The English Army, quote, unquote." Maybe our writing and speaking causes even other English speaking people to not "get it." Most Americans who travel to Scotland will say when they get to Dundee, they start having problems understanding the language. I have problems understanding rural East Texans or "Oil Field" English. >> I am sending this private mail so as not to clog up the site. You have to stop writing this. After I read it I got a vision of a regiment of teuchters from up in Skye or the Hebbies all on the line at Culloden and a regiment from Yorkshire and I still have not stopped laughing. Truth be known the generals would probably be still waiting for the line to form as they all shook hands and exchanged pleasantries and found out where they were supposed to stand. I have noticed that in most history there is a great lack of humor. My wife and I got hell the other day at a Highland games for dancing, cheering and clapping. They said we were disturbing the pipe bands. My God man we nearly pissed oor sels with the laughing, and the audience was all sullen and polite. Well, except for the few Scots scattered around, and a few members of Clan Gunn who will remain name less. The clans are taken very seriously. You never hear the Happy songs its always thon bloody harp and "My love's away died" or " I had no hope so I wrote the pope" and that crap. Its Donald Where's yer troosers, Jock MacKay of the HLI, The Biggest Lad of the forty twa and The Ball Of KerrieMaire they are needing wee a few grand war hoops. Worst of all they held a Highland Games in what is called a "Dry County". Have you ever heard of such a thing. You canna get a dram for miles. (Well, your not supposed to, but I am glad to say that all the blood is not so watered that there was nae a wee drammachie and a good smell on the breath of the odd piper. Ach well I told the wife if she doesnae behave I'll no be able to take her again. or I'll just have to leave her in the car. I hope to be allowed back in the house by Saturday week, the sheds no that bad it 75 degrees here in the winter. Dave