Well - lists that I a manage anyway............and if you are receiving this - then you are subbed to a list that I manage /administrate. Liz Haren has said "Manners count. Saying thank you when someone helps you out means a great deal." and - yes, to me that's the first rule of genealogy - whether you get soemthing through a mail list - even if it's a negative result - the thank you that you send the person who sent you that negative information in response to your query, will go a long way. Thank you - even if what you get doesn't mean anything to you - that is very, very important. I've seen replies to my original query that speak of correct English - phrasing things 'properly' - correct grammar etc...........and I know that there is at least one person who makes posts on genealogy lists for whom I have absolutely *NO* time - because if I was to spend a week siting with their one email to whichever list, I'd never make head nor tail of it. That's one person - a similar email being sent to many lists. The comment I'd have to pass, is that I don't check emails sent to any list that I am admin of for grammar...........I do think about the people who have written those emails. I totally understand and expect that the majority will not have had the education that I have received - I absolutely understand that the majority of my subscribers - for whichever list - will be much older than I am............as far as I am concerned - they know way much more about life that I do My English can be appalling - many of you, who have some understanding of the Irish language, may see, that I, as many other Irish people (and we don't actually see ourselves doing this) but- we speak English (sometimes) in a literal translation of how we'd say something in Irish. We don't realise we're doing this - if any of us was to sit any kind of 'official' exam - then, we'd probably say things differently. The First Rule of genealogy, is as Liz says - to say thanks. The second rule, is another as said by Liz................ENJOY Enjoyment - you won't get that by worrying about grammar. For me..............and I am absolutely no teacher - no grammatical expert.............my main concern would be for all of you who would worry about being 'grammatically correct' or anything like that in any email you would care/think of sending any genealogy list that I administer. Forget grammar. Please...............please - say what you would like re your ancestors - please, please don't worry about being grammatically correct. The most important thing is that you say something. Me, I have lots of letters after my name - and I deserve what I have. Believe me, if I was to sit an English exam in grammar in the morning - I'd fail - absolutely, utterly and entirely. Please, please..............to all of you who could be described as lurkers on this list (people who read messages and don't post themselves) - please, reconsider...................please say what you would like. My best to you all. Jane