The poem was a wonderful reminder of what family history is all about!   For a personal example:  Nadine Broyles (1919 - 2011), my Mom and a very wise lady, was an acquaintance and a fellow genealogist of Dessie Harrelson.  In Mom's obituary, (McLeansboro Times Leader, Feb. 2011) written during her lifetime and slightly updated after her death, she included ancestry of both paternal and maternal sides back to her great-great grandparents. She also selflessly chose to donate her body to medical science (SIU/CARBONDALE). Her remains were cremated and returned to the family at a later date, then lovingly scattered and memorialized on the grave she now shares with my Dad by a stone at Brady cemetery in Franklin County, IL. This stone also records the names of their three children on the reverse side.   Many cremated individuals or their relatives, even those whose ashes have been scattered elsewhere or have been buried in another place, perhaps even another country, have stones erected at their choice of cemetery because they value the honoring of the person by a stone "memorial" , plus, many people also have their plot and stone placed years before their deaths.  I wish more people would do this type of thing BEFORE they die in order to choose the "memorial" they like. (Thank you, my cousin Dean Smith, for doing that! Your stone at Brady is beautiful! And, thank you to my nephew, Bob Steck.  His pre-written obit. is a classic!)   ATTENTION TO ALL OF THOSE READING THIS:  PLEASE WRITE YOUR OWN OBITUARY (OR HELP SOMEONE ELSE WRITE IT FOR YOU) IF YOU WANT AN ACCURATE, DETAILED DESCRIPTION OF YOUR LIFE AND YOUR ANCESTORS AND DESCENDANTS. I'M FAIRLY CERTAIN THAT EVERYONE DIES EVENTUALLY. Don't have the belief that whomever is "around" when you die will have the knowledge that is required to do this important historical job.  (Okay, I'm doing mine right now!  Luckily,I can use Mom's for the Braden/Flannigan side.) Donna (Broyles/Braden) Mariner.   Researching: BRADEN, BROYLES, SPILLER, FLANNIGAN, STERNS, CRABTREE, CHAPLAIN, JOHNSON, WALLER, MCCLUSKEY, HILL, PARSONS, REED, PAGE, EVANS, BENSON, HEARD, OGLESBY, WEBB, ODLE, WILCOX, TANNER, LESSLEY, THOMPSON, KNIGHT, LEWIS, SMITH, CREEK/KREIG, FINKS, MCCUNE, CARTER, LOGAN, ETC.  Most of these ancestors wound up in Hamilton County and Franklin County, Illinois, some in White, Williamson, and Saline Counties in Illinois. From: Cynthia&Harry Overstreet <[email protected]> To: [email protected] Sent: Saturday, April 5, 2014 11:00 AM Subject: Re: [ILHAMILT] HARRELSON, Dessie Dora (OBIT) I loved the poem, too. On Apr 2, 2014, at 4:51 PM, Sandy Bauer wrote: > I'm just sad for the lady although I didn't know her.  I knew nothing > about her personal history or relationships within her family. > > Regardless of the situation, I think it's sad for an obituary to be > written without mentioning names of children and parents.  It's nice > to > have names of siblings as well. > > Like my paternal grandmother, I collect obits and see them as a piece > of > history as well as documentation of a life. > > For the same reason, I'm against cremation and scattering ashes in the > ocean, river, lake, etc.  I want to see a gravestone to mark the life > of > someone.  I guess that's why I've always liked this poem: > > Dear Ancestor > Your tombstone stands among the rest; > Neglected and alone. > The name and date are chiseled out > On polished, marbled stone. > It reaches out to all who care > It is too late to mourn. > You did not know that I exist > You died and I was born. > Yet each of us are cells of you > In flesh, in blood, in bone. > Our blood contracts and beats a pulse > Entirely not our own. > Dear Ancestor, the place you filled > One hundred years ago > Spreads out among the ones you left > Who would have loved you so. > I wonder if you lived and loved, > I wonder if you knew > That someday I would find this spot, > And come to visit you. > > Author Unknown > > > On 4/2/2014 1:21 PM, chuckandjoy wrote: >> You all have the details correct.  A comment about some of the posts: >>  Her grandchildren were not a part of her life.  For many years her >> caretaker was a nephew-in-law.  I found it hurtful that some of the >> comments seemed to be placing blame for what was percieved as missing >> information. >> >> >> >> >> >> -------- Original message -------- >> From: Sandy Bauer <[email protected]> >> Date: 04/02/2014  11:02 AM  (GMT-08:00) >> To: [email protected] >> Subject: Re: [ILHAMILT] HARRELSON, Dessie Dora  (OBIT) >> >> Thanks Phyllis.  I found her husband's obit posted on findagrave: >> >> Ralph S. Harrelson, M.G., 87, of McLeansboro, died at 6:35 p.m. on >> Saturday, July 3, 1999, at his home. He was a retired carpenter and >> Minister of the Gospel (M.G.). >> >> He was born on March 26, 1912, in McLeansboro a son of Edgar and Mary >> Lue (Bennett) Harrelson. On January 9, 1932, he married Dessie (Hunt) >> Harrelson in McLeansboro, and she survives. He was a Prime Mover of >> the >> Bible Baptist Church in McLeansboro, past pastor of the Knights >> Prairie >> Missionary Baptist Church of McLeansboro, past president of the >> Hamilton >> County Historical Society; board member of Genealogical Society of >> Southern Illinois, Bible teacher of Grace Baptist Church of Raleigh >> and >> Grace Baptist Church of Thompsonville. >> >> The funeral was at 11:00 a.m. on Tuesday, July 6, 1999, at Harre >> Funeral >> Home in McLeansboro. Pastor Keith Carnahan, Charles Hiltibidal, D.H., >> and Ron Nelson officiated. Burial was in Ten Mile Cemetery in >> McLeansboro. >> >> Besides his wife, Mr. Harrelson is survived by one son, James Dwight >> Harrelson and wife Julie of Springfield, Missouri; one brother, Roy >> Harrelson of McLeansboro; three sisters, Leda Daily of Collinsville, >> Ellamae Hiltibidal of Walnut Hill, Illinois, Melba Hiltibidal and >> husband Charles E. of McLeansboro; four grandchildren; and three >> great-grandchildren. >> >> He was preceded in death by his parents, one brother and an infant >> child. >> >> >> >> On 4/2/2014 3:39 AM, Phyllis Campbell wrote: >>> I totally agree with you Sandy. >>> >>> In case you don't have that information, this is what I have, IF my >>> information is correct. If it isn't, please, someone let me know. >>> >>> Daughter of Wilford A. Hunt &  Daisy Dean Randolph. Sister of >>> Heilman (Jack) Hunt. Wife of Ralph Sylvanus Harrelson. Son James >>> Dwight Harrelson. >>> >>> Phyllis Maulding Campbell >>> >>> >>> ________________________________ >>> From: Sandy Bauer <[email protected]> >>> To: [email protected] >>> Sent: Tuesday, April 1, 2014 11:40 PM >>> Subject: Re: [ILHAMILT] HARRELSON, Dessie Dora (OBIT) >>> >>> >>> What a shame there was no mention of her parents' names or the names >>> of >>> her children.  With her being a member of DAR, you would think >>> whoever >>> wrote her obit would have thought of that.    Makes me think I should >>> write my own obit to give to my children so they don't leave out that >>> kind of detail. >>> >>> >>> On 4/1/2014 4:53 PM, [email protected] wrote: >>>> Dessie Dora Harrelson >>>> 100-year-old McLeansboro resident, Dessie Dora Harrelson, died at >>>> 10:40 a.m. Tuesday, April 1 at Hamilton Memorial Nursing Home in >>>> McLeansboro.  She worked as a seamstress at the former Elder >>>> Manufacturing Co. in McLeansboro.  She was a member of the >>>> Daughters of the American Revolution at Valley Forge.  She also >>>> played the dulcimer and organ, and with accompaniment of her >>>> husband entertained widely with rendition of gospel songs. >>>> Surviving are three grandchildren, Becki Jayne Harrelson of >>>> Atlanta, GA, LuAnn Bott (Greg) of St. Louis, MO and Stacey Dynelle >>>> Atlavilla (Joe) of Rincon, GA; several great-grandchildren; 27 >>>> nieces and nephews and numerous great-nieces and great-nephews. >>>> Funeral services for Dessie Dora Harrelson will be at 11 a.m. >>>> Saturday, April 5 at the Harre Funeral Home in McLeansboro.  Burial >>>> will be in Ten Mile Church Cemetery near McLeansboro. >>>> Visitation will be from 6-8 p.m. Friday, April 4 at the Harre >>>> Funeral Home in McLeansboro. >>>> Memorials may be made to the Hamilton County Historical Society to >>>> support preservation and accessibility of the Harrelson’s personal >>>> library of historical and genealogy information >>>> >>>> >>>> >>>> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ >>>> List admin: [email protected] >>>> Info/Archives: http://lists.rootsweb.com/index/usa/IL/hamilton.html >>>> USGenWeb site: http://hamilton.ilgw.org/ >>>> ------------------------------- >>>> To unsubscribe from the list, please send an email to >>>> [email protected] with the word 'unsubscribe' without >>>> the quotes in the subject and the body of the message >>> >>> >>> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ >>> List admin: [email protected] >>> Info/Archives: http://lists.rootsweb.com/index/usa/IL/hamilton.html >>> USGenWeb site: http://hamilton.ilgw.org/ >>> ------------------------------- >>> To unsubscribe from the list, please send an email to >>> [email protected] with the word 'unsubscribe' without >>> the quotes in the subject and the body of the message >>> >>> >>> >>> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ >>> List admin: [email protected] >>> Info/Archives: http://lists.rootsweb.com/index/usa/IL/hamilton.html >>> USGenWeb site: http://hamilton.ilgw.org/ >>> ------------------------------- >>> To unsubscribe from the list, please send an email to >>> [email protected] with the word 'unsubscribe' without >>> the quotes in the subject and the body of the message >> >> >> >> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ >> List admin: [email protected] >> Info/Archives: http://lists.rootsweb.com/index/usa/IL/hamilton.html >> USGenWeb site: http://hamilton.ilgw.org/ >> ------------------------------- >> To unsubscribe from the list, please send an email to >> [email protected] with the word 'unsubscribe' without the >> quotes in the subject and the body of the message >> >> >> >> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ >> List admin: [email protected] >> Info/Archives: http://lists.rootsweb.com/index/usa/IL/hamilton.html >> USGenWeb site: http://hamilton.ilgw.org/ >> ------------------------------- >> To unsubscribe from the list, please send an email to >> [email protected] with the word 'unsubscribe' without the >> quotes in the subject and the body of the message > > > > > ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ > List admin: [email protected] > Info/Archives: http://lists.rootsweb.com/index/usa/IL/hamilton.html > USGenWeb site: http://hamilton.ilgw.org/ > ------------------------------- > To unsubscribe from the list, please send an email to > [email protected] with the word 'unsubscribe' without the > quotes in the subject and the body of the message ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ List admin: [email protected] Info/Archives: http://lists.rootsweb.com/index/usa/IL/hamilton.html USGenWeb site: http://hamilton.ilgw.org/ ------------------------------- To unsubscribe from the list, please send an email to [email protected] with the word 'unsubscribe' without the quotes in the subject and the body of the message