Myra Vanderpool's genealogy manners. She said anything she publishes in the RootsWeb lists can be freely distributed so here it is: WELDING LINKS: WHERE HAVE ALL THE MANNERS GONE? by Myra Vanderpool Gormley, CG <myravg@prodigy.net> <http://homepages.rootsweb.com/~gormleym/index.htm> One morning at 5 o'clock the phone rang. Even larks, like myself, occasionally sleep in. There is something about an early morning phone call that makes you brace yourself for bad news. However, on this occasion the caller was just a brand-new genealogist guilty of breaking one of the cardinal rules of genealogy: Thou shalt learn thy time zones and make no calls before 7 a.m. or after 9 p.m. -- receiver's time, not yours. While all rookies are going to make mistakes, we genealogists should always use good manners. Many librarians, archivists, and county clerks hate to deal with us -- in person or via e-mail. Do you know why? Because we have a reputation for being demanding and making asinine requests, such as: -- "Send me all the archival files on the Smith family." -- "I want everything you have on my family." -- "E-mail me right back with the information." Too many newcomers to this hobby assume that everything is on the Internet. It isn't. Get rid of that idea and the attitude that all family history information is free and that someone else is going to do your work for you. Genealogy is much more than collecting a bunch of names, dates, and places and slapping them into your "tree" program. Don't impose on others you have met online by asking them to do free research or solve your genealogical problems. Educate yourself. There are hundreds of free online genealogy lessons and tips. From Cyndi's List you can find such sites: <http://www.CyndisList.com/howto.htm#Education> Don't ask anyone to send you "all their files" or expect your cousins to share what has taken them 20 years to research, analyze and compile. They might, but do not expect them to do so. Remember that you are the one asking for help and seeking information. Always offer to pay reimbursement costs or for their time. And, if nothing else, send $5 or $10 when some kind soul sends you copies of photographs, a large envelope of genealogical material, or a GEDCOM. Check out the effective correspondence tips at <http://www.CyndisList.com/correspd.htm>. When corresponding with others, always offer to exchange information. After all, that's what genealogy is all about. Good manners never go out of style. You will discover that the well-mannered genealogist is also the well-rewarded one. Cheryl Rothwell LoganCty@mindspring.com