I'm in about the same situation that you are with my maternal grandfather who was born in Prussia (not too good of a clue - - it's a big state) in 1864. Came to Indianapolis but don't know what year. Was married in the Lutheran Church in Indianapolis in Nov 1890. I don't have his home town, year he immigrated, parents names or dates of birth or death. Several people on the net have given me good suggestions, but so far none of these questions have been answered. I've tried the old Indianapolis church records (written in German script) and am now trying his cemetery records. I am 77 and his only living heir. Maybe these sorts of lead are worth checking if you haven't tried. Good luck! Paul