Dude 1: "The doctor said he would have me on my feet in two weeks." Dude 2: "And did he?" Dude 1: "Yes, I had to sell the car to pay the bill." =============== What the Cluck Happened? An idiot decides to start up a chicken farm, so he buys a hundred chickens to get up and running. A month later he returns to the dealer to get another hundred chickens because the first lot had died. Another month passes and he's back at the dealers for another hundred chickens. "I think I know where I'm going wrong," he tells the dealer. "I think I'm planting them too deep." =============== Q: What game do cows play at parties? A: Mooosical Chairs. Q: What's a flea's favorite way to travel? A: Itch-hiking.