Two Polish guys are walking down the street. One of them says, sadly, "Wow! Look at that dead bird." The other guy looks up in the sky and says, "Where?" *** Two employees are talking. One of them asks the other, "How long have you been working here?" The other one replies, "Since they threatened to fire me." ***A guy goes to the doctor, and the doctor says, "I'm going to need a urine sample, a semen sample, a blood sample, and a stool sample." The guy says, "Listen, Doc I'm in a hurry. Can I just leave my shorts?" *** A golf club walks into a local bar and asks the barman for a pint of beer. The barman refuses to serve him. "Why not," asks the golf club. "You'll be driving later," replies the bartender. *** Q: Why did the math book visit the doctor? A: Because it had problems. Q: Why are cakes similar to baseball teams? A: They both need good batters.