----- >> >> >> >> >>> >>> >>> >>> >>> >>> >>> >>>  >>> >>>>>  >>>>>Happy New Year!!! >>>>> >>>>> >>>>> >>>>> >>>>>  >>>>>>>RETIRED HEALTH MESSAGE >>>>>>>>>>  >>>>>>>>>>As I was lying in bed pondering the problems of the world, I rapidly realized >>>>>>>>>>that I don't really give a rat's arse. It's the tortoise life for me! >>>>>>>>>>1.. If walking is good for your health, the postman would be immortal. >>>>>>>>>2.. A whale swims all day, only eats fish, drinks water, and is fat. >>>>>>>>>3.. A rabbit runs and hops and only lives 15 years. >>>>>>>>>4.. A tortoise doesn't run and does nothing, yet it lives for 450 years. >>>>>>>>>And you tell me to exercise?? I don't think so. >>>>>>>>I'm retired. Go around me. >>>>>>>>  >>>>>>>>God grant me the senility to forget the people I never liked, the good fortune >>>>>>>>to run into the ones I do, and the eyesight to tell the difference. >>>>>>>>  >>>>>>>Now that I'm older here's what I've discovered: >>>>>>>1. I started out with nothing, and I still have most of it. >>>>>>>  >>>>>>>2. My wild oats have turned into prunes and all-bran. >>>>>>>  >>>>>>>3. I finally got my head together, and now my body is falling apart. >>>>>>>  >>>>>>>4. Funny, I don't remember being absent-minded. >>>>>>>  >>>>>>>5. Funny, I don't remember being absent-minded. >>>>>>>  >>>>>>>6. If all is not lost, where is it? >>>>>>>  >>>>>>>7. It is easier to get older than it is to get wiser. >>>>>>>  >>>>>>>8. Some days, you're the dog; some days you're the hydrant. >>>>>>>  >>>>>>>9. I wish the buck stopped here; I sure could use a few. >>>>>>>  >>>>>>>10. Kids in the back seat cause accidents. >>>>>>>  >>>>>>>11. Accidents in the back seat cause kids. >>>>>>>  >>>>>>>12. It's hard to make a comeback when you haven't been anywhere. >>>>>>>  >>>>>>>13. The only time the world beats a path to your door is when you're in the >>>>>>>bathroom. >>>>>>>  >>>>>>>14. If God wanted me to touch my toes, he'd have put them on my knees. >>>>>>>  >>>>>>>15. When I'm finally holding all the cards, why does everyone want to play >>>>>>>chess? >>>>>>>  >>>>>>>16. Its not hard to meet expenses . . . they're everywhere. >>>>>>>  >>>>>>>17. The only difference between a rut and a grave is the depth. >>>>>>>  >>>>>>>18. These days, I spend a lot of time thinking about the hereafter . . .I go >>>>>>>somewhere to get something, and then wonder what I'm hereafter >>>>>>>  >>>>>>>19. Funny, I don't remember being absent-minded. >>>>>>>  >>>>>>>20. DID I SEND THESE TO YOU BEFORE..........?????? >>>>>>>  >>>>>>> >>>>>>>