A frantic guy runs out of a Las Vegas hotel and says to a stranger, "Buddy, please, can you loan me a hundred bucks? My wife had a terrible accident and I need to get her to the hospital." The stranger says, "If you so desperately need a hundred dollars, what are you doing in a casino?" The guy replies, "Oh, I've got gambling money." =========== The detective was leafing through the suspect's crime history folder. "Hmmm, quite a record." he said. "Shoplifting, hit-and-run, disorderly conduct, armed Robbery, sexual assault, rape, man-slaughter..." "Yeah, I know." said the prisoner. "It took me quite a while to figure out what I was good at." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Nutmeg is extremely poisonous if injected intravenously - it can kill you. On average, people fear spiders more than they do dying. However, statistically you are more likely to be killed by a champagne cork than by the bite of a poisonous spider. On average, right-handed people live 9 years longer than their left-handed counterparts. Only one in two billion people will live to be 116 or older. Over 2500 left handed people are killed each year from using products made for right handed people. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ I would like to take you seriously, but to do so would affront your intelligence. --William F. Buckley Every teenager should get a high school education -- even if they already know everything Some things that cost $5 to buy several years ago now costs $10 just to repair A synonym is a word you use in place of one you can't spell The outcome of the income depends on the outgo for the upkeep ========== =========== -- I am using the free version of SPAMfighter. We are a community of 5.6 million users fighting spam. SPAMfighter has removed 1852 of my spam emails to date. Get the free SPAMfighter here: http://www.spamfighter.com/len The Professional version does not have this message