I have seen this quite a bit, but i always think it is funny love faith --------------------- Forwarded message: Subj: Heh, heh, heh :-) Date: 97-08-18 17:19:46 EDT From: ENAZUS69 To: Laurie HOL,ALANDRA14,Babysbec To: BBYCOUNTRY,[email protected] To: HHNurse,JDMark96,Kirstn26 To: LilGknee,MCMMJM,MOMYO3KZ,Mull72 To: Sheaddy,Sweepea114,Tsmomma To: TRAC702 ************************************* The Rules of Life ************************************* 1. The female always makes the rules. 2. The rules are subject to change at any time, without prior notification to the male. 3. No male can possibly know all of the rules. 4. If the female suspects the male knows some or most of the rules she must immediately change some or all of the rules. 5. The female is never wrong. 6. If the female seems to be wrong it is because of a misunderstanding caused by something the male did or said, which was wrong. 7. If rule 6 applies, the male must immediately apologize for causing the misunderstanding. 8. The female may change her mind at any time. 9. The male must never change his mind without expressed, prior written consent from the female. 10. The female has the right to be angry or emotionally upset at any time. 11. The male must remain calm at all times, unless the female wants him to become angry or emotionally upset. 12. The female must not let the male know whether she wants him to become angry or emotionally upset. 13. Any attempt to document the validity of these rules could result in bodily harm to the person attempting such documentation. (except for the female passing this on of course..hehehehehehehe) 14. If the female has PMS, all rules are null and void at her discretion; see rules 1,2,5 & 8. Note: If you have any questions~~~PLEASE CONTACT ANY FEMALE!!!!

In a message dated 97-08-18 18:38:19 EDT, you write: << .What have you done or has someone done to help you feel loved and that you are a sister in the gospel? >> A very good friend to me, a sister in this group (connie :-)) gave me some advice before i moved here to Nashville TN about 2 1/2 mths ago... she said very plainly," Make sure you jump into your new ward with BOTH FEET" She played a very important part in my life with that advice, i got along well in my old ward, but it was an older ward, so it was kinda hard to be friends with people, friends meaning, those that got together outside of church, because we had smaller kids... So this move was important to us, we wanted to totally change how we went to church, in my old ward we didn't go to activities very often, for one reason or another.. We moved up here on a saturday, we were invited to go to a ward social but thought that we couldn't make it.. we unloaded the moving van in enough time to go, but because i didn't have a curling iron out or even clean clothes, i didn't want to go, but my husband quickly reminded me of what Connie had writen and i decided to go, although it was cancelled and we didn't know it at the time, from then on, we made the firm comitment to be there, everytime, for everything if we could do it... We haven't missed one single thing since we have been here, i got a calling the first sunday and another two weeks later, I have seen where i can be needed, and i fulfill all my callings, above and beyond what i know the norm is... I'm not saying this will work for everyone, and i'm sorry i'm longwinded about this, but i never realized just how much you can get out, what you put in, IF YOU REALLY DO PUT MORE THAN 100% INTO IT... I hope that you all can find the peice of mind that you are wanted and loved at church.. love faith

Sisters, I just wanted to share a few thoughts with you on the subject of sex education for our children. I watched the Oprah show today that discussed different ages and stages of children's sexuality. The following three stages were named..... 1. Physical Curiosity - ages 0 -3 Children this age will physically examine their genitals. When a parent witnesses this behavior it is very important that they do not react in a negative manner or panic. This is a natural and normal curiosity. 2. Physical "Plumbing" - ages 4 - 7 Children in this age bracket become curious about the differences between male and female genitals and names. The best way to handle this stage is to refer to all of the body parts with their REAL names and to not act embarassed to discuss sexual anatomy. 3. Sexual Curiosity - ages 8 - 12 Children now begin to question and discuss with their peers sexual activities. This is the age bracket when it is important to have that 'talk'. It is truly essential for children to first have this explained by their parents, who they love and trust. Children surveyed definitely wanted to hear this kind of sensitive information from their own parents - not from their peers. When this talk is given, it should be given with both parents present and actively discussing the real anatomical words and explaining things such as puberty, menstruation and the act of sex itself. Whether a boy or a girl, they should hear what both sexes go through and know the proper terms for each. Parents should use this opportunity to put their child at ease and openly answer their child's questions and concerns. (perfect timing to reaffirm how sacred our bodies are.) Sisters, I just want to take this opportunity to bear my testimony on something. Our Father in Heaven has given us the revelation that 8 years old is the age of accountability of children. I find it such a testimony builder that current studies now are proving that 8 years old is the age that children go through a great deal of change and their thinking becomes much more complicated at that age. I have a book by the Eyre's - an LDS family - TEACHING YOUR CHILDREN VALUES - they had a brilliant idea in that book. They said that they take their child out to dinner alone on their 8th birthday to celebrate the age of accountability. They also take this opportunity to explain how beautiful and how sacred sex is. They teach that child all about sex that night alone. I just think that is such a terrific idea!!!!! Looking back, I think that is the perfect time to have that talk - they are getting baptized, they are ready to be accountable. I remember when my first questions about sex came up. I was 9 years old. My husband said that his questions started coming around that age too. So, 8 years old is a good age to give that talk. That way you know that you were the one to give your child that priceless talk first. You can take away much of the mystery and curiosity before they hear all of the junk from their friends. This is also a time to explain how sacred it is and that that type of careless talk and behavior (that I am sure that they will encounter with their peers soon enough) is not appropriate. That sex is so special that it should be reserved for that person that will spend eternity with - and that person only - within the confines of a Temple Sealing. My daughter is 6 and that 'talk' is coming soon. I have always been open with her about everything that comes up, but I know the talk is going to be the beginning of a whole new facet of our relationship. I want to make sure that this transition is as smooth and loving (and morally teaching) as it can be. Sisters, I would love to hear your ideas on how you have handled the 'talk' yourselves or thoughts on how you will when your children are that age. Thank you all!!!! I sure love you!!!! Tiffani

hi everyone, thought this was cute and wanted to share it with ya'll. i love you all karrie --------------------- Forwarded message: Subj: Fwd: Letters to God Date: 97-08-18 16:21:43 EDT From: Art4HM2 To: Karbear35 --------------------- Forwarded message: Subj: Fwd: Letters to God Date: 97-08-18 16:07:33 EDT From: Karategal3 To: Art4HM2 --------------------- Forwarded message: Subj: Letters to God Date: 97-07-21 21:38:57 EDT From: Burt201 To: Taiga777,Holfa,AR2Dtoo,Flamingobr To: Renstiruny,Visiononer,Griggs13 To: Karategal3,ET Rules,Miss Ore To: KristyBB,Stine5,ArtAggie To: BubblesSC,Agapeluv,Kstand26 To: Allie2468,Chazzy,Kar91RN,Toby0805 To: PSport14,MPast9418,JBPRICE96 To: Akire344,[email protected] CHILDREN'S LETTERS TO GOD Dear GOD, In school they told us what You do. Who does it when You are on vacation? -Jane Dear GOD, Are you really invisible or is that just a trick? -Lucy Dear GOD, Is it true my father won't get in Heaven if he uses his bowling words in the house? -Anita Dear GOD, Did you mean for the giraffe to look like that or was it an accident? -Norma Dear GOD, Instead of letting people die and having to make new ones, why don't You just keep the ones You have now? -Jane Dear GOD, Who draws the lines around the countries? -Nan Dear GOD, I went to this wedding and they kissed right in church. Is that okay? -Neil Dear GOD, What does it mean You are a Jealous God? I thought You had everything. -Jane Dear GOD, Did you really mean "do unto others as they do unto you"? Because if you did, then I'm going to fix my brother! -Darla Dear GOD, Thank you for the baby brother, but what I prayed for was a puppy. -Joyce Dear GOD, It rained for our whole vacation and is my father mad! He said some things about You that people are not supposed to say, but I hope You will not hurt him anyway. Your friend (But I am not going to tell you who I am) Dear GOD, Why is Sunday school on Sunday? I thought it was supposed to be our day of rest. -Tom L. Dear GOD, Please send me a pony. I never asked for anything before, You can look it up. -Bruce Dear GOD, If You give me a genie lamp like Aladin, I will give you anything you want except my money or my chess set. -Raphael Dear GOD, My brother is a rat. You should give him a tail. Ha ha. -Danny Dear GOD, Maybe Cain and Abel would not kill each other so much if they had their own rooms. It works with my brother. -Larry Dear GOD, I want to be just like my Daddy when I get big but not with so much hair all over. -Sam Dear GOD, I think the stapler is one of your greatest inventions. -Ruth M. Dear GOD, I bet it is very hard for You to love all of everybody in the whole world. There are only 4 people in our family and I can never do it. -Nan Dear GOD, If You watch me in church Sunday, I'll show You my new shoes. -Mickey D. Dear GOD, I would like to live 900 years like the guy in the Bible. Love, Chris Dear GOD, We read Thomas Edison made light. But in school they said You did it. So I bet he stoled your idea. Sincerely, Donna

--------------------- Forwarded message: Subj: Re: Who are you? Date: 97-08-18 14:13:59 EDT From: KngFuMom To: MommyMy Lisa May 16th 1968! Riverside, CA Riverside, CA Married 10 years July 25th 1997 Daniel 9. Joshua 5, Pregnant? Homemaking instuctor, CTR 5 teacher kung fu, reading, movies, people, comp, school Here ya go! If you want to send it to all, go for it! :)

One way to make all the sisters feel like they belong would be to do a " here's what I think" What you do is have everyones name in a hat. Let each sister pick out a name. After they read the name, they are supposed to become friends with that person and get to know them. Then in a month you have each sister write a little paragraph describing the sister they became friends with. They can tell about anything they found fasinating or unique about that sister. Then each week at the beginning of R.S. you have a couple of them read out loud so that everyone gets to know about the sister. The object is to not let the sisters know that you have their name. Also, when they are read, you are not supposed to know who had the name. It is a great way to promote getting to know the sisters better. It teaches everyone how to become a friend. I wrote this to everyone, because I am sure that everyone could use the idea. Hope this helps. Kimmie

hi everyone, hope this makes everyones day. love ya all karrie --------------------- Forwarded message: Subj: Fwd: :) Date: 97-08-17 02:20:33 EDT From: GUATE13 To: Jenni10631 CC: Charoletca,Karbear35 here's something for you --------------------- Forwarded message: Subj: Fwd: :) Date: 97-08-17 00:59:46 EDT From: HeathLou To: Nick1339 CC: Kramer6969,Dr Kev 28,Bettsini CC: DMJOKER,Nbaya,GUATE13,NYkIgRrRl --------------------- Forwarded message: Subj: Fwd: :) Date: 97-08-16 23:45:53 EDT From: Mismaemae To: HeathLou,DMJOKER,C0URT,Ket 1 To: Gurgie321 --------------------- Forwarded message: Subj: :) Date: 97-08-16 16:18:52 EDT From: AstroPup69 To: Mismaemae,Jabuba 31,SurfSKAgrl To: ERiNj8,CherryLemn,RvnBld,Mems8979 To: BeckyP14,RetroJules,Avery16261 To: Gnat3,CUTECND,SPUNKY615,Aussy1 To: Zep21487,JWLS131,Lilbit1983 To: KualaTgirl,SUBOCK,Branders3 To: Sunshyned,Angelexi --------------------- Forwarded message: Subj: :) Date: 97-08-16 15:05:41 EDT From: SharpSpoon To: ToolMaru,EvilNight,SandMan376 To: AstroPup69,JudgeTrish --------------------- Forwarded message: Subj: Fwd: Get This! Date: 97-08-16 14:21:10 EDT From: Sunshyned To: A528,SharpSpoon,VITAL50 To: HIGHNOON77,Care4Ewe,Jughead182 To: Xavier111 --------------------- Forwarded message: Subj: Fwd: Get This! Date: 97-08-15 23:26:10 EDT From: Lord shake To: Sunshyned,R17CHEF,Iccy,Skittles50 To: [email protected],SDKNO4 --------------------- Forwarded message: Subj: Get This! Date: 97-08-14 19:38:34 EDT From: OwyheeRose To: JCfread,InPersuit1 To: [email protected],Spiffy6711,Borg7 To: Lord shake,SAYTR69 --------------------- Forwarded message: Subj: get this Date: 97-08-14 15:50:25 EDT From: Jamo CS To: Giggle498,Chia1183,Rsl laces To: Christipet,Belle13301,OwyheeRose To: Me is Jess,Giktorita,Canceau To: USCG Brat,GabyGirl,Twobr88815 To: Tacy25,Amy224,Afrodite77,Kiggit27 --------------------- Forwarded message: Subj: get this Date: 97-08-13 16:51:40 EDT From: ChristiWol To: Jamo CS oo$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$oo oo$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$oo oo$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$o oo$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$o. o$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$o o$$$$$$$$$ $$$$$$$$$$$$$ $$$$$$$$$o o$$$$$$$$$ $$$$$$$$$$$ $$$$$$$$$$o $$$$$$$$$$$ $$$$$$$$$$$ $$$$$$$$$$$$ $$$$$$$$$$$$$ $$$$$$$$$$$$$ $$$$$$$$$$$$$$ $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$ o$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$ $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$ $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$" "$$$ $$$$$ $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$ o$$$ "$$$$ $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$ $$$$ $$$o "$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$ o$$$ "$$$o """$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$"$$" $$ $$$$o "$$""$$$$$$$$$$""""""" o$$$ "$$$$o oo o$$$$ "$$$$$o o$$$$$$o"$$$$o o$$$" "$$$$$$oo ""$$$$o$$$$$o o$$$$"" ""$$$$$oooo "$$$o$$$$$$$$$$$""" ""$$$$$$$oo $$$$$$$$$$$ """""""$$$$$$$$$$$$ $$$$$$$$$$ $$$$$$$$ Have a nice day! Make someone feel good by sending a smile!!! >>

--------------------- Forwarded message: From: [email protected] (Heidi Weatherston) Sender: [email protected] Reply-to: [email protected] (Heidi Weatherston) To: [email protected] Date: 97-08-18 01:16:19 EDT YOU KNOW YOU'RE A GENEALOGIST WHEN..... --contributed by various America Online Genealogy Forum Staff Members ...You can't drive past a cemetery without wondering if your ancestors (or a friends) are buried there. ...You have to watch the credits of the movie you just paid beaucoup bucks to see, just to see if any of the surnames are ones you (or your online friends) are researching. ...You ask all the people you meet, what are their grandparents surnames. ...You go to the library, and instead of going to the fiction section first, (like you used to do many moons ago) you go to the "local history" or "genealogy" sections. ...You move to a new town and the first thing you look for is a historical or genealogical society in the area. ...You go on vacation and check out the local genealogy stuff. ...You go on vacation and beg your hubby to please drive 80 miles out of the way so that you can try and find your granddaddy's grave in 100 degree heat. ...Youthful fantasies of traveling to exotic places are replaced with plans to get to those little towns with graveyards, or larger towns with Archives! ...Your fear of snakes and bugs is overshadowed by the need to get through those brambles to that old gravestone. ...Old friends who knew you before you were into genealogy begin sending clippings about dead or live people with your surnames (and you know you have been talking about genealogy too much!) ...You worry about the roof's leaking only if the drips threaten your genealogy section. ...Your kids think EVERYBODY picnics in cemeteries. ...You know you're a SINGLE genealogist when you realize you've spent more time interviewing great aunt Myrtle than you did going out on dates last month! ...When you can recite all the counties of a State you've researched, but have never lived in. ...When you find your ancestor's execution by hanging, burning at the stake, etc. far more interesting than the mass-murder that just took place next door. ...You know you're a genealogist when you stand with ears wide open listening for last names. And a little bell goes off . You know a person working on that name. ...You've hounded your family for so long for their group sheet charts that you've become "persona non grata" at all family functions. ...You get a birthday present from your sister that's a license plate frame that reads, "Genealogists Do It In the Library Of Congress." ...When you read the New Testament in Sunday School and find yourself comparing the pedigrees in Matthew and Luke. ...When your dad puts you in charge of making copies of grandpa's home movies for everyone. ----------------------------------------------------------------------------- ALPHA Mailing List for Non-Offensive Humor of all kinds For assistance, contact [email protected]

We have moved alot. (too much) It seems like every year or two. One thing I have found that helps is to volunteer alot. I awalys volunteer to bring meals or set up for relief society or what ever I can think of. I am always busy unpacking and getting settled but I find the effort to get involed pays off. I make the time to do extras. I also find having the missionaries over helps. I am sure if you ask your RS president if there is a need you could help with she will find one. Food committeees, teach a homemaking class ect. We have also had a game night at our house and invited other families over. One last thing when we lived in Ohio a sister in our ward invited us and other members in our ward who did not live near family over on the holidays. It was wonderful. We all contributed to the dinner and it was really nice to feel a part of something bigger coming from a large family I missed them on the holidays. Also getting close to thoose you visiting teach helps. Sorry to ramble I hope some of these Ideas help. Love Cora ps Take cookies and treats to people in your neighborhood and say hi I am your new nieghbor...( you could also do this for your bishopric or who ever you choose..just do it and welcome your self don't wait to be welcomed) It really makes a great first impression.

Hi all, I moved here to NC about 2 years ago. And after 2 years I am now at a point that I now feel that I belong and am accepted in my ward. The ward I belong to has more than 50 % of its sisters that are inactive. Since I am the Visiting Teaching cordinator it presents alot of challenges. A couple of the sisters, in the last few weeks have broke down and cried in or after relief society due to their feelings of not feeling like they belong. I know how they feel. But I don't want them to have to wait 2 years to feel like they belong. My question is........What have you done or has someone done to help you feel loved and that you are a sister in the gospel? Thanks, Terese (E Terese)

To those sisters who are leaving the group: We all have ups and downs in our lives. So it will be in this group. We learn from our trials, and I believe this trial we are enduring as the group grows will help each of us if we let it. Please remember than when things being to happen to strengthen and build up the testimonies of members of the church, Satan will be there trying to stop it. I know that I have personally been helped by the stories and emotions shared by this group. Some are very troubling, but we don't live in Ozzie & Harriets neighborhood. Real life is a challenge. I personally deleted all mail that I saw was in reference to the situation, therefore I have tried to go on. Please stay and help those that are in need of your strength. And lets love one another. Love, Cyndee

Something else cute you might enjoy. Tina << "A Genealogists Christmas Eve" Author Unknown Michigan Historical Magazine 'Twas the night before Christmas when all through the house Not a creature was stirring, not even my spouse. The dining room table with clutter was spread With pedigree charts and with letters which said: "Too bad about the data for which you wrote. It sank in a storm on an ill-fated boat." Stacks of old copies of wills and the such Were proof that my work had become much too much. Our children were nestled all snug in their beds, While visions of sugarplums danced in their heads. And I at my table was ready to drop >From work on my album with photos to crop. Christmas was here, and of such was my lot That presents and goodies and toys I'd forgot. Had I not been so busy with grandparents' wills, I'd not have forgotten to shop for such thrills. While others had bought gifts that would bring Christmas cheer, I'd spent time researching those birthdates and years. While I was thus musing about my sad plight, A strange noise on the lawn gave me such a fright. Away to the window I flew in a flash, Tore open the drapes and I yanked up the sash. When what to my nearsighted eyes should appear, But an overstuffed sleigh and eight small reindeer. Up to the housetop the reindeer they flew With a sleigh full of toys, and ol' Santa Claus, too. And then in a twinkling, I heard on the roof The prancing and pawing of thirty-two hoofs. The TV antenna was no match for their horns, And look at my roof, with hoof-prints adorned! As I drew in my head, and bumped it on the sash, Down the cold chimney fell Santa- KEE-RASH! Dear Santa had come from the roof in a wreck And tracked soot on the carpet! I could just wring his neck! Spotting my face, good old Santa could see I had no Christmas spirit, you'd have to agree. He spoke not a word, but went straight to his work And filled all the stockings. (I felt like a jerk). Here was Santa, who'd brought us such gladness and joy; When I'd been too busy for even one toy. He spied my research on the table all spread. "A genealogist!", he cried (My face was all red). "Tonight I've met many like you", Santa grinned, As he pulled from his sack a large book he had penned. I gazed with amazement- the cover it read "Genealogy Lines For Which You Have Plead". "I know what it's like as a genealogy bug", He said as he gave me a great Santa hug. "While the elves make the sleighful of toys I now carry, I do some research in the North Pole Library!" " A special treat I am thus able to bring To genealogy folks who can't find a thing." "Now off you go to your bed for a rest- I'll clean up the house of this genealogy mess." As I climbed up the stairs full of gladness and glee, I looked back at Santa who'd brought much to me. While settling in bed, I heard Santa's clear whistle To his team, which then rose like the down of a thistle. And I heard him exclaim as he flew out of sight, " Family history is fun! Merry Christmas! Good night!" >> --------------------- Forwarded message: From: [email protected] To: [email protected] Date: 97-08-18 14:28:06 EDT In a message dated 97-08-18 01:58:37 EDT, [email protected] writes: << "A Genealogists Christmas Eve" Author Unknown Michigan Historical Magazine 'Twas the night before Christmas when all through the house Not a creature was stirring, not even my spouse. The dining room table with clutter was spread With pedigree charts and with letters which said: "Too bad about the data for which you wrote. It sank in a storm on an ill-fated boat." Stacks of old copies of wills and the such Were proof that my work had become much too much. Our children were nestled all snug in their beds, While visions of sugarplums danced in their heads. And I at my table was ready to drop >From work on my album with photos to crop. Christmas was here, and of such was my lot That presents and goodies and toys I'd forgot. Had I not been so busy with grandparents' wills, I'd not have forgotten to shop for such thrills. While others had bought gifts that would bring Christmas cheer, I'd spent time researching those birthdates and years. While I was thus musing about my sad plight, A strange noise on the lawn gave me such a fright. Away to the window I flew in a flash, Tore open the drapes and I yanked up the sash. When what to my nearsighted eyes should appear, But an overstuffed sleigh and eight small reindeer. Up to the housetop the reindeer they flew With a sleigh full of toys, and ol' Santa Claus, too. And then in a twinkling, I heard on the roof The prancing and pawing of thirty-two hoofs. The TV antenna was no match for their horns, And look at my roof, with hoof-prints adorned! As I drew in my head, and bumped it on the sash, Down the cold chimney fell Santa- KEE-RASH! Dear Santa had come from the roof in a wreck And tracked soot on the carpet! I could just wring his neck! Spotting my face, good old Santa could see I had no Christmas spirit, you'd have to agree. He spoke not a word, but went straight to his work And filled all the stockings. (I felt like a jerk). Here was Santa, who'd brought us such gladness and joy; When I'd been too busy for even one toy. He spied my research on the table all spread. "A genealogist!", he cried (My face was all red). "Tonight I've met many like you", Santa grinned, As he pulled from his sack a large book he had penned. I gazed with amazement- the cover it read "Genealogy Lines For Which You Have Plead". "I know what it's like as a genealogy bug", He said as he gave me a great Santa hug. "While the elves make the sleighful of toys I now carry, I do some research in the North Pole Library!" " A special treat I am thus able to bring To genealogy folks who can't find a thing." "Now off you go to your bed for a rest- I'll clean up the house of this genealogy mess." As I climbed up the stairs full of gladness and glee, I looked back at Santa who'd brought much to me. While settling in bed, I heard Santa's clear whistle To his team, which then rose like the down of a thistle. And I heard him exclaim as he flew out of sight, " Family history is fun! Merry Christmas! Good night!" >> --------------------- Forwarded message: From: [email protected] (Heidi Weatherston) Sender: [email protected] Reply-to: [email protected] (Heidi Weatherston) To: [email protected] Date: 97-08-18 01:58:37 EDT "A Genealogists Christmas Eve" Author Unknown Michigan Historical Magazine 'Twas the night before Christmas when all through the house Not a creature was stirring, not even my spouse. The dining room table with clutter was spread With pedigree charts and with letters which said: "Too bad about the data for which you wrote. It sank in a storm on an ill-fated boat." Stacks of old copies of wills and the such Were proof that my work had become much too much. Our children were nestled all snug in their beds, While visions of sugarplums danced in their heads. And I at my table was ready to drop >From work on my album with photos to crop. Christmas was here, and of such was my lot That presents and goodies and toys I'd forgot. Had I not been so busy with grandparents' wills, I'd not have forgotten to shop for such thrills. While others had bought gifts that would bring Christmas cheer, I'd spent time researching those birthdates and years. While I was thus musing about my sad plight, A strange noise on the lawn gave me such a fright. Away to the window I flew in a flash, Tore open the drapes and I yanked up the sash. When what to my nearsighted eyes should appear, But an overstuffed sleigh and eight small reindeer. Up to the housetop the reindeer they flew With a sleigh full of toys, and ol' Santa Claus, too. And then in a twinkling, I heard on the roof The prancing and pawing of thirty-two hoofs. The TV antenna was no match for their horns, And look at my roof, with hoof-prints adorned! As I drew in my head, and bumped it on the sash, Down the cold chimney fell Santa- KEE-RASH! Dear Santa had come from the roof in a wreck And tracked soot on the carpet! I could just wring his neck! Spotting my face, good old Santa could see I had no Christmas spirit, you'd have to agree. He spoke not a word, but went straight to his work And filled all the stockings. (I felt like a jerk). Here was Santa, who'd brought us such gladness and joy; When I'd been too busy for even one toy. He spied my research on the table all spread. "A genealogist!", he cried (My face was all red). "Tonight I've met many like you", Santa grinned, As he pulled from his sack a large book he had penned. I gazed with amazement- the cover it read "Genealogy Lines For Which You Have Plead". "I know what it's like as a genealogy bug", He said as he gave me a great Santa hug. "While the elves make the sleighful of toys I now carry, I do some research in the North Pole Library!" " A special treat I am thus able to bring To genealogy folks who can't find a thing." "Now off you go to your bed for a rest- I'll clean up the house of this genealogy mess." As I climbed up the stairs full of gladness and glee, I looked back at Santa who'd brought much to me. While settling in bed, I heard Santa's clear whistle To his team, which then rose like the down of a thistle. And I heard him exclaim as he flew out of sight, " Family history is fun! Merry Christmas! Good night!" ----------------------------------------------------------------------------- ALPHA Mailing List for Non-Offensive Humor of all kinds For assistance, contact [email protected]

I think that couples with children struggle more and the potental for REAL happiness is there when you give and share with kids. Those without get to do "funner" things but like my sociology book said, singles get to do more fun things but fun and happiness are not the same thing. And that is a Liberal book! THe world would have us think they are the same. Remember even the elect will be decieved. It is hard to be a parent in a day and age when we get little respect evenfrom members! But as any mom or dad knows when you look at your child and see them sleeping, running, learning how could you feel more joy? Only when you look at the other parent of the child and see them loving, helping and nurturing that child. I rest my case! Love, Lisa

In a message dated 97-08-18 01:58:37 EDT, [email protected] writes: << "A Genealogists Christmas Eve" Author Unknown Michigan Historical Magazine 'Twas the night before Christmas when all through the house Not a creature was stirring, not even my spouse. The dining room table with clutter was spread With pedigree charts and with letters which said: "Too bad about the data for which you wrote. It sank in a storm on an ill-fated boat." Stacks of old copies of wills and the such Were proof that my work had become much too much. Our children were nestled all snug in their beds, While visions of sugarplums danced in their heads. And I at my table was ready to drop >From work on my album with photos to crop. Christmas was here, and of such was my lot That presents and goodies and toys I'd forgot. Had I not been so busy with grandparents' wills, I'd not have forgotten to shop for such thrills. While others had bought gifts that would bring Christmas cheer, I'd spent time researching those birthdates and years. While I was thus musing about my sad plight, A strange noise on the lawn gave me such a fright. Away to the window I flew in a flash, Tore open the drapes and I yanked up the sash. When what to my nearsighted eyes should appear, But an overstuffed sleigh and eight small reindeer. Up to the housetop the reindeer they flew With a sleigh full of toys, and ol' Santa Claus, too. And then in a twinkling, I heard on the roof The prancing and pawing of thirty-two hoofs. The TV antenna was no match for their horns, And look at my roof, with hoof-prints adorned! As I drew in my head, and bumped it on the sash, Down the cold chimney fell Santa- KEE-RASH! Dear Santa had come from the roof in a wreck And tracked soot on the carpet! I could just wring his neck! Spotting my face, good old Santa could see I had no Christmas spirit, you'd have to agree. He spoke not a word, but went straight to his work And filled all the stockings. (I felt like a jerk). Here was Santa, who'd brought us such gladness and joy; When I'd been too busy for even one toy. He spied my research on the table all spread. "A genealogist!", he cried (My face was all red). "Tonight I've met many like you", Santa grinned, As he pulled from his sack a large book he had penned. I gazed with amazement- the cover it read "Genealogy Lines For Which You Have Plead". "I know what it's like as a genealogy bug", He said as he gave me a great Santa hug. "While the elves make the sleighful of toys I now carry, I do some research in the North Pole Library!" " A special treat I am thus able to bring To genealogy folks who can't find a thing." "Now off you go to your bed for a rest- I'll clean up the house of this genealogy mess." As I climbed up the stairs full of gladness and glee, I looked back at Santa who'd brought much to me. While settling in bed, I heard Santa's clear whistle To his team, which then rose like the down of a thistle. And I heard him exclaim as he flew out of sight, " Family history is fun! Merry Christmas! Good night!" >> --------------------- Forwarded message: From: [email protected] (Heidi Weatherston) Sender: [email protected] Reply-to: [email protected] (Heidi Weatherston) To: [email protected] Date: 97-08-18 01:58:37 EDT "A Genealogists Christmas Eve" Author Unknown Michigan Historical Magazine 'Twas the night before Christmas when all through the house Not a creature was stirring, not even my spouse. The dining room table with clutter was spread With pedigree charts and with letters which said: "Too bad about the data for which you wrote. It sank in a storm on an ill-fated boat." Stacks of old copies of wills and the such Were proof that my work had become much too much. Our children were nestled all snug in their beds, While visions of sugarplums danced in their heads. And I at my table was ready to drop >From work on my album with photos to crop. Christmas was here, and of such was my lot That presents and goodies and toys I'd forgot. Had I not been so busy with grandparents' wills, I'd not have forgotten to shop for such thrills. While others had bought gifts that would bring Christmas cheer, I'd spent time researching those birthdates and years. While I was thus musing about my sad plight, A strange noise on the lawn gave me such a fright. Away to the window I flew in a flash, Tore open the drapes and I yanked up the sash. When what to my nearsighted eyes should appear, But an overstuffed sleigh and eight small reindeer. Up to the housetop the reindeer they flew With a sleigh full of toys, and ol' Santa Claus, too. And then in a twinkling, I heard on the roof The prancing and pawing of thirty-two hoofs. The TV antenna was no match for their horns, And look at my roof, with hoof-prints adorned! As I drew in my head, and bumped it on the sash, Down the cold chimney fell Santa- KEE-RASH! Dear Santa had come from the roof in a wreck And tracked soot on the carpet! I could just wring his neck! Spotting my face, good old Santa could see I had no Christmas spirit, you'd have to agree. He spoke not a word, but went straight to his work And filled all the stockings. (I felt like a jerk). Here was Santa, who'd brought us such gladness and joy; When I'd been too busy for even one toy. He spied my research on the table all spread. "A genealogist!", he cried (My face was all red). "Tonight I've met many like you", Santa grinned, As he pulled from his sack a large book he had penned. I gazed with amazement- the cover it read "Genealogy Lines For Which You Have Plead". "I know what it's like as a genealogy bug", He said as he gave me a great Santa hug. "While the elves make the sleighful of toys I now carry, I do some research in the North Pole Library!" " A special treat I am thus able to bring To genealogy folks who can't find a thing." "Now off you go to your bed for a rest- I'll clean up the house of this genealogy mess." As I climbed up the stairs full of gladness and glee, I looked back at Santa who'd brought much to me. While settling in bed, I heard Santa's clear whistle To his team, which then rose like the down of a thistle. And I heard him exclaim as he flew out of sight, " Family history is fun! Merry Christmas! Good night!" ----------------------------------------------------------------------------- ALPHA Mailing List for Non-Offensive Humor of all kinds For assistance, contact [email protected]

Actually the social aspect of church is very important! If we don't feel welcome or loved, how many people are the point that they don't care? Actually even the strongest care. To fellowship is sooooo important. To see others that are in this with us and uplift each other is the reason for church, isn't it? Or we could just do it at home! We need to get most of our spiritual strength at home anyway right? thats what we are told, so church is for fellowship, opportuities to serve and to love one another. We are social beings! We should realize thatand give ourselves a break! huh! Love ya, Lisa

In response to where is the faith and testimony or someone struggling to go to church, I'd like to say with love and understanding, that although someone may have a testimony and faith not everyone is always comfortable in church. Why? There are many reasons. People can be a scary thing to face especially when you have been hurt by them a lot. And if someone is stronger in that area great! But lets be understanding of those who have different personalities and talents. Judgements should be left to the Lord and he came to save, not judge. Sometimes we compare others with ourselves and think what worked for us will work for them, but we must realize that the path is straight ( meaning a wide path ) and there is room for the shy and outgoing and leaders and artists etc. Together we are whole. I like the Indian proverb, don't judge a man unless you have walked a mile in his moccasins"" and even then maybe you have different feet size etc! So what I'm trying to say is we may not understand a persons feelings because we have not been there, but there feelings are just as legit as ours and we should pray for them and ourselves! Jesus showed us the example, he was loving and understanding and not contentious. As the hym says, in the quiet heart is hidden , sorrow that the eye can not see...... God bless you all, us all! Love, Lisa

{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{Kim}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}} I feel for you! All I can say is that if anyone thinks less of you that's on them! We should not judge another and it's not a reflection of you, he is just struggling. And therrefore you are too. Sometimes it's hard to go to church, but even when you don't feel like it and think everyone is judging you (I say this from experince) you feel much better after going. Love, Lisa

Yes mam! ;) Lisa

When I had no place to go, I went to my knees. - Abraham Lincoln

I hope this doesn't annoy anyone, this is my first mail via gen rooters. Could I get a reply to see of you all got it? Thanks sooooooo much! {{{{{{{{{{{{{To all}}}}}}}}} Lisa ;)