Paula, I took the Jamie tape in and after $100 had not success in making it more hearable. They guy spent about $500 worth of his and his computer's time, and he is an expereienced guy in his own studio who has been doing sound and video stuff for 16 years. He was very apologetic, but it still didn't work. Next is the tape of my conversation with Mother after I got home two years ago. It makes one realize how poorly one talks, and I can see that I said a lot of things to her that I'm sure she took offense at. I think there is some good stuff in it, but may tend to agree with Q that, although she didn't sound too rational to me when you analyze it and realize that she wouldn't answer any of my questions, someone might think she didn't sound all that bad. So for what it's worth, you can read it and see what you think and whether it's worth mentioning to Q again when you see him this week. M = Mother R = Rex M. Hello R. Hello, mother. This is Rex M. I thought this would be you. We just got home last night., and we had two messages. I was going to call you today but we went out this morning. I got this message about you wanting me to come back down when we got here. M. Did you talk to Paula? R. No. I did talk to Jamie. I had two messages to call her. M. Who? R Jamie. M. Yes. R. I did talk to her a couple of minutes ago. M. Did she call you? R. Well, she called me twice and left messages. M. She keeps calling me, too. R. (Unintelligible) kept leaving messages for me to call her back so I just...we got home late last night, and I'm just now able to get calls back. M. Well, I knew you were away, but I thought you were avoiding me, too. R. Nope. We stopped and saw Becky. In fact I wrote you a letter last night which I have already sent, but there is no reason to avoid you, but anyway we stopped in and saw Becky and stopped at St. George again, and we got snowed in in Flagstaff. M. That's OK. R. And it took us 5 days to get home. M. Well, I knew that would probably happen, but I also thought you were avoiding me. R. No, not at all. Why would I avoid you? M. Well, of course as I would say that I'm a little suspicious, or you would say I'm out of my mind. R. No, I wouldn't say that at all. M. I can't say anything because I don't like what's going on, and (untintelligible) Jamie leave me alone, and I'm not going to move until I've settled things with my family. R. Well, what do you need to settle? M. Well, you sure got me in a mess. R. How did I do that? M. Well, you can probably figure it out. R. I don't think so. What we're trying to do M. Yes, I know what you're trying to do - it's the right thing in a way, but it's not right for me. R. Well, I'm afraid that it's at a point that it's not right for you to stay there where you are now, when you can't - you shouldn't drive the car. M. I'm not driving the car. R. Well, I didn't say that you were - you shouldn't drive the car, and for you to stay where you are, uh, you're just by yourself. M. Yes R. At the Springs... M. I'm (unintelligible) and I don't think people should try to run my life. I'm not out of my mind. I'm not crazy. R. Nobody is trying to... M. Well I think Paula is trying to make it seem that way. R. Nobody is trying to run your life. We.... M. So if you.....You know, I had you both as my beneficiaries, or my whatchama call it, I... she wants to do it herself and I put you on because I thought you had a little more common sense. (unintelligible) she charmed Sandy ....... and Sandy doesn't like me anymore. R. I don't think that's right either. M. I know it .... I can tell. So I don't (unintelligible) against me (untelligible) in every way. R. There's no one here against you at all. I don't think Paula's against you, I'm not against you, Sandy's not against you. M. She certainly is. She certainly is. She's doing everything she can to make life miserable for me. R. Well, if you lived over at the Springs she couldn't do anything to make life miserable for you. M. Yes I hear that (unintelligible) R. Well, I'm mentioning it because to me, I thought that was..I know it's not - I know it's not home M. That's not - that's not the problem at all and I keep telling Jamie that. That's not the problem. The problem is my family. R. No the - I think the problem is that - that your attitude, and that if you would go over to the Springs M. You make me have the attitude. R. No, I don't make you have any attitude at all. When we came there three weeks ago - or four weeks ago now, you told me many times you couldn't understand why you sleep all the time and why you couldn't seem to function very well, and that you needed somebody to help you. Now you told me that several times. M. That's the way you all look at it, but you're R. That's the way it was. M. You're making life miserable for me, now if that's what you want to do - you broke your father's heart, now don't try to break mine. R. Well, perhaps you both broke my heart. When you turned around and you left and you said you were never coming back, I said don't go - it will be harder if you do. You both turned around and you both left and you never came back, you said you were never coming back and I was just supposed to be up there. M. We thought that Joyce didn't want us there. R. And you thought that she was sick and so you couldn't even overlook that if you thought she was sick. M. I bet you think she's sick now. R. We don't get along too well, but I don't think she's sick. But now, the point is I'm, not doing anything to you and Paula is not doing anything to you. M. She is too. R. She's trying to help you out and take care of you. M. She is not. You know what she wants? When I told her I was putting you both on as – my uh– Whatchamacallit - I thought you would at least use some judgement, but she won't. (Unintelligible) R. I use the very best judgement that I can use. And the best judgement when I came down there and what I saw and when you had that accident with the car, the best judgement is that I can't be down there all the time cause I live up here. M. I don't want you down here. R. And, and Paula is there, she can do what she can do, but I know you don't get along very well at. If you were at the Springs, you could lead your own life there, and we would come over and visit when we came down M. That has nothing to do with it. The day we stopped at the Springs, that was not where I was headed for at all. There was another place I was interested in. We got there and you just fell in love with Jamie and the Springs, and I liked it too. R. That was the place you've been telling us about for the last 12 years. M. I haven't been talking about it for (a long?) time. R. You haven't been talking about if for the last five years, but for a long time you just thought that was a very good place to go. You took us there M. Unintelligible... R. So what are you going to do? (Long Pause) Why did you want me to come down? M. I don't want you to come down, I just want you to know that.. R. You told me on the phone on the message you left for me to come down because it was more important than anything I was doing up here. Why did you want me to come down? M. I wanted you to know that things were going on here. She has my neighbors watching me all the . R. Mother, people are concerned about you. M. Oh, well I R. You can't just live there by yourself and shut yourself off from your neighbors M. I don't believe... R. And from Paula. M. Unintelligible. Do you know what she wants? She wanted to be my power of attorney. She wants .. The money. R. Oh, I don't think so. M. I think so. R. (Unintelligible) I'm concerned, I want that money to be there for you to use as you need to hyhtake care of yourself for the rest of your life. M. (Unintelligible) have to stay in a place that's going to break me up. R. It's going to do what? M. That's going to break me up. In a couple of years I won't have anything left. R. You can pay... I went over that with you and I can even send you the numbers. You can pay for that with what comes in every month. What you can get from your social security M. I just wanted you to know that I don't like what you and Paula did together and .... R. We didn't do anything together. (Pause) We did not do a thing together. I came down there - Sandy and I came down there, we were there with you for three weeks, at one point in time you said let's go look at the Springs - we had talked about these things before, and so we went over and looked at it, and they had a beautiful place there... M. (Unintelligible) fell in love with it. R. Well, it's a very nice place M. It's a nice place but that's not where I want to be. R. Well, you can't be.. If something happens and you've talked for the last several years that you might be in a wheelchair, you cannot be in a wheelchair in your house, in your mobile home. It's not a wheelchair friendly place. You can't get in and out of the door. A place like the Springs, no matter what happens M. There's another place that I was really headed for that day, but we stopped there first. There was another place that I wanted to go. R. We could have gone because we didn't go back there and you didn't sign up until the next day. M. Well I can see that we're not getting anywhere, so we might as well shut up. R. Well, I think that what you should see M. I don't want you to come back and uh, as I said Sandy fell in love with Paula and Paula (unintelligible) R. I think you worry way too much about that sort of thing. Sandy did not fall in love with Paula, Paula did not charm her, Sandy has somebody she can talk to M. (Unintelligible) does that with everybody. R. But it doesn't make any difference. What we're talking about is you, and we're talking about you taking care of yourself, be at a place where you can take care of yourself and you can't do it at home. M. And I probably.. Actually we stopped in there the other day and Jamie just assumed that I wanted to show Paula R. Well there's no reason she might not assume that... M. That's not what I came for. I came because I wanted to talk to you (Jamie) and get things settled, and pay you whatever I have to pay. And she just assumed that I was bringing her in, and I said you're wrong (Unintelligible) R. Well, how are you going to live there by yourself M. I'm not going to live where I am. I'm going to move, but I don't want to move there. R. Then you move wherever you think you like better, but you ought to go there very quickly and find out - and compare it - and find out that that's where you really want to move, because I think, as I recall, we had about two weeks to pay your first month's rent, and if you don't pay it by Thursday or Friday M. I discussed that with Jamie we are, we are, we understand each other and I can accept (Unintelligible) I can be just as stubborn as anybody else. anybody else. R. Well I'm not stubborn at all. I want to find ... we want to do what the best thing for you is, and we want to find you a place... M. You didn't find me a place, I already found it R. Well, I know you did, but now you want to find some other place., and I'm saying that you should go and find that other place in the next day or two, and, and compare it. M. Well, I'll take care of that. They wanted me to, they wanted me to get everything ready and the mover called me and he wasn't going to come and bundle up my things. He was expecting me to do it. R. Well, we offered to stay there for a week and help you bundle them up. M. Well, R. And you wouldn't let us touch anything. We could have very easily spent this whole last week there and had everything ready to go, and you would not let us do it. M. OK. Well (Unintelligible) So you just live your life and I'll live mine. R. Well that's not a very - that's about the way it was when you left Idaho Falls 25 years ago. You couldn't discuss anything with me. The only thing that could happen is we could come down and see you for some period of time. The fact that you said you would never come back didn't take me into account at all. What it took was you and your feelings into account. M. We were trying to save.. R. You were trying .. You had your feelings hurt and you were trying to get out of there, is what it was. You never talked to me at any time about any problem you were having with Joyce and she didn't talk to me either. M. I never had any problem with Joyce. R. Well you must have had some kind of a problem. M. What? R. You must have had some kind of a problem, because you turned around and left and you said you would never come back, and I remember those words very clearly, and you don't think it hurt my feelings that you did that. And it took you away from your grandchildren and it wasn't my fault. You're the people that left; it wasn't me. I told you to stay and get it worked out and you wouldn't do that for one more day. (Unintelligible) Well you do what you want to do. M. That's what I'm going to do. R. And, I'm not coming down dI would come down to help get you ready to move if your'e going to move. I'll do whatever I can. M. I don't want you to. R. But I cannot come down just to sit around and talk about all of this, and I think you're making a terrible mistake to think that I'm plotting against you or that Paula is plotting against you or anything else. M. But you just left me in a mess. R. I did not leave you in a mess. You signed the papers to move. We said you even had an extra month there, so if you didn't want to move right away, but if you wanted to make your payments starting next week, you had time to do it. And (unintelligible) and we offered to stay, and what you're saying to me is not rational. M. See, you're trying to prove I'm not (unintelligible) R. I'm saying what you're doing right now is not rational. If you would go to someplace light the Springs or some other place of your cnoosing and would choose to live there and get involved in what they do you would be a very rational person, but you cannot take care of your checkbook yourself, you cannot take care of the car things yourself: there are things you cannot do; it's not your fault, it's just M. I've done it for years. R. You've done it for years but you can't do it now. M. I bet I could. R. I bet you can't, because when I left in February I had your checkbook up to date. There were two months in there where there were no entries at all, where there were no blank checks to see what you had written the checks for. I was trying to find out if you had paid your car insurance or not. You didn't seem to know whether you had paid it or not. You had the golf cart proof of insurance in the car, and you did not have the car proof of insurance. M. Where would I put it in the golf cart? R. I said you had one of these cards for the golf cart and you put it in the caras thought it was the... M. I carry that in my golf purse. R. Well, OK, that's fine but the point is you did not have anything showing proof of insurance on the car in the car. All you had in there was the golf thing. But what I saw when we came down there that were several areas of your life that are very difficult for you, and you kept telling me, you said I have too many things to do; there's too much to do, too much to do. You go to a place like the springs, they take care of that responsibility for you or Paula could help you or I could when I'm down there, but M. You still have a lot of things on your mind. R. But you can get rid of some of the things. If you don't have somebody to help you, you're going to have a lot more things on your mind. You can only decide that. I'm not trying to put you away or anything else. Only you can decide. I'm saying, OK, I fell in love with the Springs. I thought it was as nice a place as I could possibly imagine for you to live. For you to eat and you need to eat in order to keep your strength up, there's activities there for you to do M. (Hung up)