Issues 36 & 37 are missing from the film. The Ellaville Sun Friday, March 24, 1939 No. 38 SCHLEY SLANTS by Raymond Duncan WHAT'S A CRASH BETWEEN GOOD BUMPERS? An Americus man parked his car in front of the post office Tuesday morning and went in to buy a stamp. While he was inside another driver parked horizontally behind him. Returning, he cranked up and without taking a look to see if the way was clear, rammed the front bumper of the auto. The sound of the crash convinced him something was wrong, so he came forward, cut his wheels sharply and applied the reverse. This time he scraped the front fender of the vehicle on his right. "Come help me get out of here," he yelled to a pedestrian. "You can't get out until the car behind you is moved," he was told. "The man will be gone in a few minutes." Asked the driver, "Oh. is there a car BEHIND me?" HE SAW A WELCOME WRITTEN THERE Sgt. Henry J. Dyess of the U.S. Army Air Corps at Fort Benning, who likes to think up clever "excuses" for his frequent visits home, pulled a new one last week. He flew low over Ellaville last Friday morning and saw his mother, Mrs. Lucy Dyess, standing in her yard. Next morning he drove up in his automobile. "I get here as soon as I could," he announced. Mrs. Dyess didn't understand. "Why," explained Jake, "when I flew over yesterday I thought you wrote 'come home' in the sand." HE THOUGHT HE SWALLOWED HIS TEETH The horror that he might have swallowed his false teeth while he slept gripped C.S. Wall one morning last week. Mr. Wall awakened his wife and asked, "Do you reckon I have swallowed my teeth?" He had searched all the places he usually puts them each night--under his pillow, on a table by his bed and on the mantel. They were missing. "The last I remember about them." Mrs. Wall quoted her husband as saying, "I dreamed they had divided in the middle but I put (portions missing--typesetting error?) I could have swallowed them if they had divided in the middle?" The dream worried Mrs. Wall, too, and she began to think he had swallowed them. So she got up--and found them under the bed! TICKETS FOR THE TATTLER Because she tattled on her husband, two guest tickets to any show next week at the Rylander theater, Americus, are being mailed Mrs. Wall today. Chief value of the SLANT is the sympathy it will stir among the ranks of the people who try to wear store-bought teeth. I've heard enough distracted folks moan about their false teeth to know that it's a safe bet to pass along to them the experiences of a fellow sufferer. For Mr. Wall's information, though, if he had swallowed those teeth, he wouldn't have been uncertain about it. As a lad, I swallowed a couple of molars, one while eating blackberries and cream, another while eating watermelon. There was a sensation that was not at all amusing as they passed through the esophagus. A mouthful of them should make one feel like he had swallowed a lawn mower. Despite the fact that this was the first week of the offer, to give passes for the best SCHLEY SLANT, much interest was shown, several people calling or mailing in items. U! nusual incidents involving people all of us know happen every day. Just tell this column about one of them, and you'll be eligible for next week's tickets. Remember, no writing is required. Just disclose the facts. Of course all suggestions can't take the prize, but any suitable item will be published. Tickets are given by this column through courtesy of J.N. Morgan, manager of the Americus playhouse. He suggests to Mrs. Wall that the classic "Jessie James," starring Tyrone Power, Henry Fonda and Nancy Kelly, is playing next Thursday and Friday. SHE WAS NOT FORGOTTEN They extend birthday greetings at the Methodist Sunday school each week. Somebody mentioned last Sunday that Miss Maude Hillsman, who was absent, would observe a birthday this week. So the congregation sang, "Happy Birthday. Miss Maude, etc." When classes assembled, the ladies' class voted to send Miss Maude a gift, and appointed a committee to buy it. Told that the song had wished her a happy birthday, Miss Maude replied, "You all remembered me in plenty of time--my birthday comes in June!" LIGHT THE CANDLES Birthday greetings to Mrs. J.A. McGill. March 16; Radford Price, March 22; Miss Mary Hazel Powel, March 25; Miss Margaret Battle, March 27. HE LIKES HER SYSTEM Olin Miller, writing in Quaint Tales From Georgia Quills, appearing on the editorial page of The Atlanta Journal, Wednesday endorsed Mrs. Munro Murray's recipe for a long life: She Bolied The Pot: "Mrs. J.M. Murray reached her 84th birthday Monday and credited her longevity to work---just straight work---and I boiled the pot. Mrs. Murray believes "boiling the pot" is essential to good health."---Editor Raymond Duncan, in The Ellaville Sun. Undoubtedly Mrs. Murray has something there, as the slanf saying goes. There are probably more vitamins and mineral salts, in forms more easily assimilable, in a pot of boiled turnip greens, for instance, than in many a package of drug sore vitamins. As Editor W.D. Horton, in the Telfair Enterprise (McRae), points out. "Grandmother didn't have a shelf load of cook books and she didn't know what a calorie was, but when it came to getting up a real meal she had the world best." SHAVING BLAZE AT LUMBER YARD Firemen extinguished a shaving pile blaze at Alexander Brothers Lumber company Monday afternoon at 1:10 o'clock. An employee of the company said no loss was sustained. ROBINSON BARN BURNS TUESDAY Loss of More Than $1,000.00 Inflicted by Flames Fire of undetermined origin destroyed a barn on the John Robinson farm in Lowe community early Tuesday morning, inflicting a reported loss of more than a thousand dollars. Mr. Robinson was painfully burned about the head, neck, hands and feet in attempting to extinguish the flames. Two mules, a calf and approximately 300 bushels of corn were burned. A third mule was badly burned. The fire was discovered shortly after 1 o'clock. BLIND CORONER HIT BY AUTO "Kitty" Rigsby is Knocked Down Crossing Street U.H. (Kitty) Rigsby, Schley county's blind coroner, was reported resting well Thursday, recovering from slight injuries and severe shock sustained Wednesday afternoon when he was knocked down by an automobile as he was crossing the street here. Edgar Fouche, who struck Mr. Rigsby as he backed from a parking space, said he did not see the blind man. The accident occurred about 1:30 o'clock. A physician said he was only slightly hurt, but added there was a possibility of internal injuries. BIRTHS Mr. and Mrs. Marvin Pixton of Johnson City, Tenn., announce the birth of a son Saturday, March 18. He weighed eight pounds, and has been named Marvin Pixton, III. Mrs. Pixton is the former Miss Geraldine Arrington of Ellaville. end # 38