I'M NOT GOING TO TAKE THIS LYING DOWN The owner of a tanning salon in Ft. Worth, Texas, was a bit suspicious when a 17-year-old came running into her shop. "Are you being chased?" she asked him. "No, I just want a tan," he replied. She showed him to a tanning bed and, once he stripped down to his underwear and got inside, called the police. Pursuing police officers that had lost him in the vicinity of the salon dropped by, identified him as the suspect in a bank robbery, and arrested him. (Reuters) ...Stated desire: deep bronze. Actual result deep doo-doo.