> >Subject: Women Issues > > > > > > Q: Should I have a baby after 35? > > A: No, 35 children is enough. > > > > Q: I'm two months pregnant now. When will my > baby move? > > A: With any luck, right after he finishes > college. > > > > Q: What is the most reliable method to > determine a baby's sex? > > A: Childbirth. > > > > Q: My wife is five months pregnant and so > moody that sometimes she's > >borderline irrational. > > A: So what's your question? > > > > Q: My childbirth instructor says it's not > pain I'll feel during > >labor, but pressure. Is she right? > > A: Yes, in the same way that a tornado might > be called an air > >current. > > > > Q: When is the best time to get an epidural? > > A: Right after you find out you're pregnant. > > > > Q: Is there any reason I have to be in the > delivery room while my > >wife is in labor? > > A: Not unless the word "alimony" means > anything to you. > > > > Q: Is there anything I should avoid while > recovering from childbirth? > > A: Yes, pregnancy. > > > > Q: Do I have to have a baby shower? > > A: Not if you change the baby's diaper very > quickly. > > > > Q: Our baby was born last week. When will my > wife begin to feel and > >act normal again? > > A: When the kids are in college. > > > > > > "ESTROGEN ISSUES" > > 10 WAYS TO KNOW IF YOU HAVE "ESTROGEN > ISSUES" > > > > 1. Everyone around you has an attitude > problem. > > > > 2. You're adding chocolate chips to your > cheese omelet. > > > > 3. The dryer has shrunk every last pair of > your jeans. > > > > 4. Your husband is suddenly agreeing to > everything you say. > > > > 5. You're using your cellular phone to dial > up every bumper sticker > >that says "How's my driving-call 1-800-***-." > > > > 6. Everyone's head looks like an invitation > to batting-practice. > > > > 7. You're convinced there's a God and He's a > male. > > > > 8. You can't believe they don't make a > tampon bigger than Super > >Plus. > > > > 9. You're sure that everyone is scheming to > drive you crazy. > > > > 10. The ibuprofen bottle is empty and you > bought it yesterday. > > > > TOP TEN THINGS ONLY WOMEN UNDERSTAND > > > > 10. Cats' facial expressions. > > > > 9. The need for the same style of shoes in > different colors. > > > > 8. Why bean sprouts aren't just weeds. > > > > 7. Fat clothes. > > > > 6. Taking a car trip without trying to beat > your best time. > > > > 5. The difference between beige, ecru, > cream, off-white, and > >eggshell. > > > > 4. Cutting your bangs to make them grow. > > > > 3. Eyelash curlers. > > > > 2. The inaccuracy of every bathroom scale > ever made. > > > > AND, the Number One thing only women > understand > > > > 1. OTHER WOMEN > > > > Send this to five bright, funny women you know > and make their day. > > > > WE ALL NEED TO SMILE !!!!!!! .·:*´¨`*:·..·:*´¨`*:·. *: * Richiele * * *·. .·* `*·-:¦:-*´ ³´`*:»§«:*´`³