Twas the Night Before Christmas 'Twas the night before Christmas, and everyone slept, Except the Genealogist, who out of bed crept, To check the computer and regular mail box, To heck with the ties, and chocolates and sox. Everyone else is sleeping like a log. Oh, oh, be careful, I fell over the dog. Whoops, just listen, what's that on the roof? Santa has caught me, being a goof. I'll hide under the desk, till he goes away; If he caught me up, what would he say? Hurry up Santa, what did you bring? Drop it and run--let me see everything! I want Aunt Sadie, and great Uncle Bert, Also Grandma Blitzen-that wouldn't hurt. Cousin Gertie's a mystery, where did she go? And old Uncle Cyrus, who walked really slow. Will I ever find them, in the next 20 years? Or have they disappeared?-that's one of my fears. Wow! Santa's gone, it took him a while; Why did he laugh, instead of just Smile? Oh, he left me some papers! what do they say? Great Uncle Bert fell into the Bay! He was drinking vanilla and dancing like crazy, When all of a sudden, things began to get hazy. Well, that settles that, I'll quit looking for him, Why in the world, couldn't he swim? Aunt Sadie was a sinner, and she ran away, With the Parson, no less-what can I say? Grandma Blitzen was bitten by a big yellow snake, She picked it up-and thought it was a rake. Cousin Gertie ran a bar, away out in the West, A stray bullet got her--no bullet proof vest. Uncle Cyrus was a hermit, in a cave on the coast, Threw his money in the ocean, or so he did boast. So, thanks for the answers, Santa, my friend, I'll quit looking for them, it's been a dead end. I'll go back to bed and turn out the light, Merry Christmas to all, and to all a Good Night. --Anonymous