Joyce and all, I agree, thank yous are nice, but privately would be best. There is nothing genealogy related in them. However, since it's been brought up I've done some thinking and although my comments weren't asked for I feel compelled to give some. I hope it's okay with you all. Sometimes people have overwhelming lives and to expect thank yous every time is not realistic. I try to say it, but I'm sure I've forgotten it too. My life has changed radically in the past 15 mos., and I'm still coping. Don't judge people as being rude for not always using nicities on in response to your help. Help because you want to help. I have given up alot of family data, links, sources to not get a thank- you back, many times. I don't let it influence my thinking of that person. often they want to go out and research and in their eagerness, they take the leads I give and are off like a TB in a race and I hear back maybe 6 mos or later about a new finding and they say thanks for getting me the info. I needed to do that. Many times people help in subtle ways, without expecting anything as a result. I hope I don't embarrass her, but Connie Mead is one of those people. She has often responded privately to me, with a lookup, or with helpful info. She is always one of the people on the list willing to help. She is also one of the most caring I've ever met. She knows what I have gone through the past 15 mos. and every so often in my email, up pops a Card from Connie Mead, timed just about when I need an uplift. Many people came to my help the first day of my loss, many came after, offering their help. Few know how to help though. Connie is one of those rare people, who helps very quietly, very unassuming and without any expectations. I salute you Connie, today, July 3rd, as being a real hero. You are truly all American. I am proud to say I have met your acquaintance and this is my THANK YOU to you for being there for mos. by my side, in your quiet, unassuming way. NEver expecting a thank you, nor did you receive any, and yet, you persisted, sending card after card to me, timed as I said, to help. All special occasions have been met with a card. Tomorrow as I celebrate July 4th, I will be thinking of you and others like you, Americans who are truly caring and helpful people. People like you made AMerica what it is today. this may not be the place for thank yous, but I am making a huge point here. People who care can help, without expecting anything in return. Connie is one of those people. So today I am trying to make a point and at the same time point out a true humanitarian. I applaud Connie and others like her, who give effortlessly and without expectation. Thank you again Connie, from the bottom of my heart. Thank you everyone, who like Connie, has been there for me, for us, for the list. It truly is a good list and there are many here who care. remember our goal, to find our ancestors, and let that guide you. Don't be persuaded away from seeking the info. you are looking for....you deserve to know your ancestors, you have the right to seek it and above all else, I hope that each of you help where you can those who need the info. Knowledge, like books, should be shared items. I believe a general THANK YOU to the list for helping should suffice for everyone who may have pitched in on a particular request/query, or private emails should be sent by the seeker, but remember, each person has a life and sometimes it is easy in every day life to forget to say thank you. Best to just ask if they got the info. and see if that prompts a thank you if you need it to verify they received the info. For me, having a small ranch, 12 horses, hay to put up, irrigation to do, fences to mend is an everyday, time consuming chore, and I often do mean well, but put off the thank you notes until "Tomorrow" and forget. With the passing of my spouse, my life has been topsy turvy and finding a balance has been a struggle. The note wasn't directed to me but I'm hoping that for those who think of non-thank yous as rude you think of the other side. Perhaps the person has a very consuming life (Don't we all, but some more than others). What is the saying ? walk a mile in someone's shoes before you condemn them. (something like that, anyway, good idea). Debbie ----- Original Message ----- From: "Joyce G. Reece" <jgreece@earthlink.net> To: <CherokeeGene-L@rootsweb.com> Sent: Sunday, July 03, 2005 11:34 AM Subject: Re: [CherokeeGeneCommunity] FYI and a Question > Don > > She was referring to a past post in which one poster and spoken to another poster about saying thank you etc. It is/was nothing important. BUT you are correct. Taking emails off list can be a bad thing sometimes. We all strive for one word, one post, one itty-bitty item that will point us toward firm information....thus the reason for these mail lists. I'm a firm believer in open communication...its helped me enormously several times. > > Joyce Gaston Reece > ----- Original Message ----- > From: Don Ott > To: CherokeeGene-L@rootsweb.com > Sent: Saturday, July 02, 2005 11:24 PM > Subject: Re: [CherokeeGeneCommunity] FYI and a Question > > > Well I can tell you that I really enjoy this list but I most enjoy it > when people answer to the list. Some of those answers are connected to my > family. When we answer off list I never know about that. Why do you > encourage folks to answer off list? I can just easily delete a response that > is not related to my family. I am eager to publicize all my family, why are > you not? > Don > ----- Original Message ----- > From: <MLi2408512@aol.com> > To: <CherokeeGene-L@rootsweb.com> > Sent: Saturday, July 02, 2005 5:42 PM > Subject: Re: [CherokeeGeneCommunity] FYI and a Question > > > > May I remind people that this list is not for arguing and insults but for > > genealogy. Might > > I suggest this be settled through private emails. > > > > > > > > Marceil > > > > > > ==== CherokeeGene Mailing List ==== > > This list is for Genealogy related conversations > > Your supporting website http://www.wvi.com/~wb/Cherokee1.html > > Please Good manors and no flaming others > > For Culture, ridges; bumps; skin tones; or Language lessons Please visit > > CHEROKEE-L-request@rootsweb.com > > You can also find what you need search the archives > > or to get off this list via web site below > > http://lists.rootsweb.com/index/other/Ethnic-Native/CherokeeGene.html > > Listowner = CherokeeGene-admin@rootsweb.com > > > > > > > > ==== CherokeeGene Mailing List ==== > This list is for Genealogy related conversations > Your supporting website http://www.wvi.com/~wb/Cherokee1.html > Please Good manors and no flaming others > For Culture, ridges; bumps; skin tones; or Language lessons Please visit > CHEROKEE-L-request@rootsweb.com > You can also find what you need search the archives > or to get off this list via web site below > http://lists.rootsweb.com/index/other/Ethnic-Native/CherokeeGene.html > Listowner = CherokeeGene-admin@rootsweb.com > > > ==== CherokeeGene Mailing List ==== > This list is for Genealogy related conversations > Your supporting website http://www.wvi.com/~wb/Cherokee1.html > Please Good manors and no flaming others > For Culture, ridges; bumps; skin tones; or Language lessons Please visit > CHEROKEE-L-request@rootsweb.com > You can also find what you need search the archives > or to get off this list via web site below > http://lists.rootsweb.com/index/other/Ethnic-Native/CherokeeGene.html > Listowner = CherokeeGene-admin@rootsweb.com > > > > -- > Internal Virus Database is out-of-date. > Checked by AVG Anti-Virus. > Version: 7.0.308 / Virus Database: 266.11.8 - Release Date: 5/10/05 > >