) ( ( ) Good Morning Family! ( \ .-.,--^--. ( Come on in. . . \* ) \\|`----'| - The coffee pot's on. . . .=|=. \| |// ...and we even have decaf, |~'~| | |/ tea, and hot chocolate! | | \ / _|___|_ ------ (_______) Today's topics include: 1. Welcome to new cousins 2. A message for our experienced computer genealogists 3. A message for our newbies and novices TO OUR NEWEST COUSINS ~~ On behalf of the entire family, I'd like to extend a most hearty welcome to those cousins who came into the family fold this past week. We are very glad to have you with us and hope you'll stay and remain a part of our online family. As soon as you're comfortable with us and the list, please send in your Bower[s]/Bauer, Baur or Bowra lines so we can all see how we're related to you. We do not have a fancy format for sending in records or queries to the list. Post as many as you wish! If the data has anything to do with Bower[s]/Bauer, Baur or Bowra ancestors or any of the 81+ variant spellings we research that might help someone, please feel free to post it. Every scrap of information is appreciated. If you haven't visited the homesite of this list yet, you are encouraged to do so. Our home is Bower Community, located at <http://bowercommunity.com>. There, we currently have two sites: The Bower Family Homestead [a.k.a., the Homestead] is our primary homesite and the gathering place for much of our information. It waits to join us all in welcoming you into the family at <http://bowercommunity.com/homestead>. Smaller is our sister site, the Bower Cottage, which houses most of our projects including an online GEDCOM fed by cousins from our research groups. Find the Cottage is at <http://bowercommunity.com/cottage>. A MESSAGE FOR OUR EXPERIENCED COMPUTER GENEALOGISTS We already have and will have new cousins in our ranks who are brand new to genealogy and/or to computing. It's so exciting to be able to join the ranks of one's peers in a common goal. On the other hand, it's hard to adjust to someone who jumps in without really knowing how "to play" the game. Novices and well-experienced ~ I'd like to remind you of "those" days back when ... when you were feeling those funny quirks of "how-do-I's"... Remember when you first started genealogy ~ how everything was rather confusing for a while? Then, when you jumped on the Web with that first computer? ... your first email discussion list? ... The time has rolled around to another January ... a month filled with brand new genealogists and computer users ... one filled with the necessity of patience, understanding and kindness ... one that makes we experienced family members the teachers. I have no doubt that you are ready to step in and help our newest family members as they begin their lessons. A MESSAGE FOR OUR NEWBIES AND NOVICES [Long. You'll probably want another cup of coffee] "All these people know more than I do. What AM I doing here? I don't belong and if I say anything I'm going to sound like a real dummy. If I just read the messages, nobody will know I'm here. I can't foul anything up that way and nobody can make fun of or yell at me." You're a newbie, not sure of what you're doing here, but know you want to find your lines. You don't know much about genealogy, hardly anything about your lines, are scared to death to say anything or post your data, so you do what's called 'lurking'. You know there's a roll call but don't know where to send it, and even if you do, you're afraid you're going to do it wrong because you've never done it before. So you don't bother to send one in. You know somebody's got a site but how do you find it? ...And queries? "What are those? Am I allowed to make one?" "What if what I say is dumb?" "These people all sound so smart; if I say anything I'm gonna sound like a real dummy!" "I'm so new at this I don't really have any information to contribute." "What was it I'm supposed to say again?" "Where ARE all these sites everyone is talking about? ... and where do I find that Web site called URL?" "If I just read the messages, nobody will know I'm here. I won't embarrass myself that way and nobody will make fun of or yell at me." Newbies, does any of the above currently sound familiar? Do you feel intimidated, nervous and/or ignorant, while everyone is confident and smart? Well, I'm here to tell you that every single one of us "confident and smart" people have been in PRECISELY the same spot you're in right now! On the average I receive 2-3 messages a week reading something akin to the above two paragraphs. This is a message from the heart meant and targeted directly to all you newbies and some of you novices. You need to know that the fear and intimidation you feel posting messages to the list are exactly what I felt....what everyone feels - no more and no less. Every experienced researcher had to "walk the fire." I know your fears and worries. I know your concern of intimidation. I wore all those labels I'm sure, right in the middle of my forehead. I teach genealogy today in schools and I do guest speaking at seminars. When I talk to newbies I understand your confusion; I was confused for months! This confidence and brilliance you're seeing from the cousins is something built on trust ... trust in the family, trust in one another that we can make mistakes without fear of humiliating reprisal from someone. The internet can be a scary 'place'. It's hard to tell in an email whether or not someone is joking, or serious and dumping on you. You newbies still have your lessons to learn but now you're doing it behind a keyboard and monitor. But you have one advantange over a lot of others...... You belong to the family. When you joined this list, you joined a family. You did not just join a group of people who care only about themselves and their own research. You joined an international family of cousins who feel EXACTLY the same as you, at first scared, intimidated and nervous -- no matter what country we're from. We ALL want to find our lines, but we have something special in us -- we take care of our own. If you're a newbie or a novice, you're a treasure to we experienced researchers. Are you aware of that? ANY little scrap of information offered up is valuable. Even scraps, once pulled together, will help fit puzzle pieces together. That's why you newbies are so important. You tend to provide many of those tiny bits of family info that a lot of us long-time researchers haven't been able to find in records. ["Oh this? It was in my Grannie's Bible! I didn't think it was all that important......."] Actually, most newbies are a wealth of information! The problem is many newbies [and on some lists, even well-experienced researchers] are intimidated by list managers that mandate this and that, and rather than help or teach will subjugate or totally shove aside the newbie as someone who just doesn't know what they're doing. The newbie gets hurt or frustrated with the treatment they've received, leaves the list and takes some really important data with him/her. [This is a lose-lose situation. The newbie doesn't have the opportunity to find his/her ancestors and the list membership loses out on information the newbie carries.] To all our newbies, know this..... you WILL NOT be flamed (receive hateful messages) by anyone in this family, nor will anyone else. You WILL NOT be intimidated or humiliated by anyone, either; likewise, nor will anyone else. It just doesn't happen here. Family takes care of family, and we take care of our newbies, our novices, and each other. The penalty for flaming in the family is immediate removal. You may be corrected by someone for TYPING AN ENTIRE MESSAGE ALL IN CAPS [not proper netiquette, by the way, as it's considered yelling] but it will be a constructive and gentle correction. You may be told your query is too wordy to be a query or doesn't contain enough information, but the criticism will be constructive and gentle. You may be told you neglected to put in places or dates in a post or a roll call message, but that also will be constructive and gentle. You will not be picked on, nor will you be subjugated ["you're just a newbie"] or shoved aside like some know-nothing. Know also that you are an extremely important part of this family. No matter how little it may be right now, you bring new familial knowledge to us and with experience, will have the ability to apply it. Please learn from those of us who have walked your path, stay with us and help us to break down the brick walls you keep hearing about. Post your queries, messages and roll calls. Add data to the discussion as you can. Most of all, DON'T BE AFRAID TO ASK FOR HELP. You'll most assuredly get it here. Don't lurk - participate and learn. You have but to ask when you don't understand or don't know. After all, it's family....it's what WE'RE all about. My coffee cup is empty for yet another week. I so enjoyed spending this time with you today. Thank you for sharing it with me. I wish each of you a week filled with health, productivity, fun, and above all, filled with love and inner peace. ) ( ) _.-~~-. (@\'--'/. Colleen ('``.__.'`) `..____.'