I know what you mean. My folks are almost 85 and 87 and they've been giving stuff away for the past 2 years. They've got their estate all neat and tidy, Mom's set aside specific items for specific grandkids, etc. But, it's so eery to have her ask me "Do you think that so-and-so would like this when I die?" jeez, I don't want to get involved in that. It's just 'stuff' and 'stuff' can wait til the time comes. I'm not in to fighting over 'stuff', and I don't think my brothers are either. But, evidently Mom is concerned that everything be as she wants it, neat and tidy as always (being the compulsively neat and tidy person that she is.) She wants some control over things even when she's gone, I guess. lol Mom and Dad have been saying, if you want something go ahead and take it now. And I've refused everything so far, just 'cause I didn't want to encourage that behavior. Makes me feel like they're planning to drop any moment. One brother has taken some books that were offered to him. And then, when I teased him about it, he asked which ones I liked a lot, I mentioned 5 or 6, and he packed them and sent them to me. No big deal. (These were books we'd all enjoyed reading as kids. If they have any value, I'm not aware of it.) Anyway, Mom and Dad's garage is just about empty. The only thing I'm interested in is the old photos, and I'll divide them up and hand them out so someday each of the great grandkids will get some of them. And I'll scan them all before I hand them out. The real estate, I'm hoping, will go into an education fund for the grandkids and great grandkids. We'll see. I really think Mom will make it to 100! If so, I'm not sure if there's enough left to be concerned with. I hope she goes on a cruise or does something fun with their money. Jan G. <<I would rather have my parents than anything they have. I would give all I have to get my father back. After a year it is still so hard. I miss him so much. I still have my mother and want to keep her for a long time, but she misses dad and says she is ready when the good Lord wants to take her. I told her she has a lot of years left and not to rush it. I hope it gets easier for her being without dad. They were married for 54 years and mom says she wouldn't give up a day of it. I have never seen two people so much in love. Whitewolf _________________________________________________________________ Join the worlds largest e-mail service with MSN Hotmail. http://www.hotmail.com