As the child of a parent with mental illness, even though mother has been gone more than five years, to this day I have people who bring up the odd things our mother did and said at the ending of her days. I tell them: My mother would not have chosen mental illness any more than their parents chose the cancer, Parkinson's or heart disease that took them. In fact, mom would probably have preferred one of those, as her friends and acquaintances would have understood those as illnesses, and stuck by her. Most people don't understand mental illness, so they fear it and stay away. A kind doctor once told me someday there will be a vaccination for mental illnesses and we'll wipe it out as we have many of the physical diseases. Until then, hug, care for, love and do all you can to understand the disease your mentally ill friends and relatives battle. They live in a hell we can never understand and need love and attention just as much as those with a physical disease. As a genealogist, it meant I had to wipe the slate clean of most of what I was told of our family history growing up. I began from the beginning with the paperwork I had and that found in mom's estate. I see that as a good thing as I didn't waste time chasing all those pipe dreams we were told of being related to famous people, etc. and as I went step by step backwards, I gained the documentation needed for proof, plus it kept me on the right track. Your friend's situation is sad. His mother may have had something very treatable, such as a hormonal imbalance or post-partum depression, yet he was deprived of his mother and she her family all those years. Yes, thank God for advancements in mental health care. Sue >============================== >Find your ancestors in the Birth, Marriage and Death Records. >New content added every business day. Learn more: >http://www.ancestry.com/s13964/rd.ashx